Like, speed kills man…

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It gives you lung cancer. I hate running out of cigarettes while
tweaking, that is like totally uncool, man…seriously though, I’ve been
without smokes for two days and it’s killing me. Not literally of
course, it’s doing my lungs a whole lotta good in fact. Anyway, I’m too
lazy to go out in the cold weather and go “I’ll have a pack of Marlboro
reds 25’s please”. Needless to say, I’m living quite far from
civilization. The nicotine monster running through my veins is
(unwillingly) satiated by my large stock of nicotine gum…but nothing
beats inhaling a nice lungful of smoke! I’ve caught myself putting on
my sweater and ready to walk out the door, but nah, I’m not going to
take a long walk just to buffer the war chest of Philip Morris Limited.
I have been resorting to some stuff that probably every smoker out
there has done though. I’ve subjected half-smoked cigarette butts in my
ashtray to a second combustion process. Don’t look at me like that…in
times of need, we make do, don’t we? I’ve also upturned by room to find
old boxes of cigarettes to extract the wealth that is loose tobacco
leaves. It’s surprising how much brown toasted tobacco one can yield
from cigarette boxes, especially if you pack them before opening. I’ve
managed to harvest a nice pile, which I smoked with my bong. I wouldn’t
say it tasted good, especially the stale bits, but you gotta do what
you gotta do. πŸ˜‰ I also bummed one off CT today. That’s the one that weakened me…I haven’t had RYO’s for years!

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It was nicely rolled and the tobacco was that rum and wine (I think)
mix that I favored years ago too, and damn was it good!!! I didn’t let
the atmosphere sneak a single wift off that one, dragged on it
constantly till I was holding it like a joint and ended up getting a
(okay, three!) lungful of burning filter. I have tasted human blood…get
out of the way everyone! I decided I needed more and I remember seeing
the guy who lives downstairs smoking, so I went knocking at his door. πŸ™‚

Me: Hello, I live upstairs and this would sound strange, but
I ran out off cigarettes and I was wondering if I can buy some off you.
Guy: Oh, sure! No problems, how many do you want?
Me: Can I get 5 off you? I’ll pay you for the trouble.
Guy: Don’t worry about it. It’s fine.
(Guy goes and gets his pack and gave me five.)
Me: Thanks! Here, I don’t feel good about taking them.
(Hands him a A$5 note)
Guy: No, don’t worry about it, it’s fine, being neighbours and all.
Me: Nah, I would prefer it if I paid you for this, I’m not comfortable with bumming them off you like that.
Guy: It’s fine. You can just give some back to me when you get a pack.
Me: Ah…I really don’t feel good about it, coz it’s not like I’m just getting one or two off you.
Guy: Really, it’s fine. You don’t have to worry about it. You can just return them when we bump into each other next time.
Me: I would feel much better if I paid you for this. Seriously, I insist.
Guy: Well…you sure?
Me: Yes. Thanks for the smokes.
(Hands him the A$5 note)
Guy: Oh…thanks.

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That was uncomfortable…it’s like that ang pow pushing back and forth
thing, I can see why he’s reluctant to accept the money since we live
near each other, but I would not feel good about getting that many off
him without paying him. It’s not like we know each other all that well,
it’s a nodding acquaintance, so it feels funny to bum that many off
him. Anyway, I’ve had three already. No! Conserve!!! Unfortunately,
he’s partial to the brand I find most distasteful…Winfield! I think
it’s lights some more. He doesn’t pack his cigarettes either. Oh well,
beggars can’t be choosers.

It’s such a disgusting habit…it’s a wonder it’s legal. πŸ˜‰

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