Former drug blogger comes clean about his past

sixthseal

I was featured in Nicole Tan’s column of The Star today. I logged on this morning and saw the rather…dramatic, shall we say, title and and the first thought that came to my mind was not a thought per se, but rather an abbreviation – OMFG.

Word has also been going around that I’ve been dating around the office (which is totally untrue – I go out with coworkers for lunch, but I don’t have any relationships in the office). If I were any younger, my immediate reaction would be anger and disappointment rolled all into one huge boulder…

…but having mellowed out a bit, I have learnt to accept that gossip will go around, and like Chinese whispers, everything gets twisted into something nowhere even near the resemblance of truth.

[Edit: Hmm…I realize this may have been a bit of a low blow on my part. I apologize. My bad.]

Nicole, don’t worry about it, it’s not your fault. I agreed to do the interview and all credit AND blame should rest with me for the consequences that come after that.

God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change
Courage, to change the things I can
and Wisdom, to know the difference.

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67 thoughts on “Former drug blogger comes clean about his past”

  1. If the world corporate CEO whom makes mistake in business investment and caused million of losses can be accepted back in business world, then there should NOT be any problem for a society to accept a man who previously had make a mistake in his personal life.
    Every man/woman deserve a second chance. Let’s give them a chance to turn new leaf and live a better life.
    All the best to u, man. May god bless you.

    Reply
  2. Hi, I got your message about the bloggers meet but unfortunately by the time I saw the message it was already past midnight. I guess I missed it. yeah read about you on the star. I admire your courage. Come out from the past and start anew again, you’ve got that strength in you to be who your are today. 🙂

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  3. I logged in star online to read the article and yes, I did NOT like the way the article has been written. I would think there are more subtle ways of putting things…aa well as focus and angles in looking at them. Anyway, my heart goes out to you, Huai Bin…; I’ve always been there all these years and here I’ll stay. I believe in seeing a person for what he/she is or tries to be…

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  4. you’re a star PH, a role model for lots of us out there..
    to crash and fall, be reduced into ashes and yet rise back again like the phoenix.
    good stuff mate!

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  5. Dear PH,
    You’ve been trough a lot. I believe that you can pass this challenge with ease. I believe so do your other readers. Just hang in there.
    You’ve got my support (morally)!

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  6. hang on there mate.
    some people have pretty rigid mind and it’s pathetic. you just have to do what you believe is right.

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  7. i guess everyone have same concern like you do, but as long as you are clean and good at what you do, you’ll be an important asset in any company who hire you.

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  8. This is totally unfair. But is it true? Maybe they are supporting the government in attacking bloggers. Giving bloggers a bad image in Malaysia. As Blogs will bring done the multimedia business

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  9. Dude, I have been reading your blog since 2003 and this is my first ever comment. Sixthseal.com was the first blog I ever read and one of the few that I check for daily updates. You really put yourself out there in all your posts and I really admire that. I used to dread the few times that I couldn’t access your website, because I just knew that you would have had an OD or some other hairy shit.
    Anyway, all I want to say is, you have overcome so many hurdles and faced them with Balls of Steel. If your present employers cant handle your past, and more importantly, if they don’t understand the journey you have traveled and the man that you are today, it ain’t no biggy.
    The world is out there and its yours for the taking.

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  10. You’re one of the bravest people I can think of. My blog is anonymous but I still censor myself “just in case”, but you blog about the real you and that takes guts. It does make a difference. You’re one of the only “real bloggers” that ever was, and that’s something very important.
    You are what you do. Nobody has a clean record, so to speak, but if you’re proud of the things you’ve done lately then no one can dispute what you’re capable of.

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  11. hey there HB.
    I came across your article in today’s paper. It’s touching to know how God works in not the best people, rather, working the best out of people 😀
    I’ve also a cousin who was saved from the gallows of substance abuse…thank god for that.
    http://glassheartcheez.blogspot.com/2008/07/im-addicted.html
    is a little article I wrote about ‘an addiction’, it’s ironic how so many things are related.
    Jeremiah 29:11 bro, you’re gonna be big in these big plans of his 😀 Cheers.

    Reply
  12. I’m a former idiot. But that doesn’t stop me from being a smart alex….
    I guess being a former drug addict shouldn’t be a good excuse to hinder from achieving the things you desire

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  13. Dear HB’s HR department ( I know you are reading this) , bear in mind that as long as an employee’s life style does not impede his/her job performance and office environment there is no ground to interfere with his/her personal affair.
    Your company or share holders will not be too confident with your position as a human resource manager for keep a team of law abiding, clean cut, ass kissing but uncreative, unproductive employee who hinders the earning potential of the company stock.
    I understand the dilemma, there are always pros and cons, you will have customers who think HB is too wild and shy away from him. On the other hand there are customers who appreciate his creativity and unorthodox life style because creativity and unorthodox is essential for a engineer, this attribute allows him/her to think independently outside the box and come out with ideas.

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  14. I’m Graceshu’s youngest brother, been reading your blog ever since 2003 and this too, is my first time commenting.
    Don’t stop leading the wild into the ways of man HB. 😉

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  15. at the end of the day it is performance that counts in the workplace. u just have to work harder than every body else to prove others’ prejudice wrong. I believe in you buddy.

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  16. gasp!!! unbelievable… rehash of old news makes heads turns. your life is an open secret.. dunno what all the fuss is about. like you said, “how many actually walks the walk?”

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  17. Thanks for all the support! 🙂
    …and I’m surprised that there’s not even a single, lone negative comment. Haha!
    Seriously, your collective concern is much appreciated. I’m feeling better now. Gonna write a post and then reply all the comments. Cheers all!

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  18. Interestingly (to me anyway) that is the first time I have heard/seen a non-Caucasian use the term “Chinese whispers.”
    I have faith in your innate intelligence to overcome this obstacle, and good luck and best wishes go with it.

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  19. Past is past. I don’t understand why they open old wounds because what has happened has happened. From my view your social life was and is completely separate from your professional life so I don’t see what the problem is as long as your performance hasn’t slipped. Nor do I understand why the article twists your honest words and completely forgets to mention the journey you have come and how you have changed and overcome your flaws.
    Its just media HB, keep your head up.

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  20. I applaud you for turning your life around, what is disturbing however is the half-baked “writer”’s focus in that little post; which is mostly the most sensational episodes of your life, likely motivated to advance her very own career ladder. I’ve serious doubt if she could careless about yours. This’s “longkang” journalism, or if it’s journalism at all.

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  21. Thanks all! 🙂
    This in indeed a sixthseal.com first in the 7 years I’ve been blogging. No negative comments at all.
    I’m touched. 🙂
    Going out to grab some lunch, will reply the comments individually when I get back. Cheers!

    Reply
  22. Hey…I bet you are not what was written in the article as your current now?
    That right….that was past, what is important now is you are enjoying your life with joy and friends!
    Face it brave and never give up life!
    Cheer,
    May god bless you with more joy!

    Reply
  23. willchua: Thank you, my friend. Yeah, second chances…well, we’ll see how everything goes. 🙂
    (=’.’=): Thanks! 🙂 Yeah, I’ve learnt to find peace in the knowledge that I can do what I’m good at…which is, writing and other creative stuff. OMG, I sound arrogant. I’m not.
    suituapui: Thanks buddy. You’ve been a family friend for so long, and you know us well. Unfortunately, others do not. Oh well, I’ll take whatever comes. 🙂
    kimberlycun: Thanks Kim! 🙂
    You know small town folks…always gossiping and concerned about what you do in your own bedroom. Not related to work performance but you’re judged 24-7 anyway. *shrugs*
    Fist of Asia: Thanks for the support, my friend! Cheers! 🙂
    Ying Yang: Financial support, can? 😉
    fred: Thanks, buddy.
    GF: Yeah, I’m learning to be at peace with the stuff I can’t control. Questions have been raised about my ability to write a post every day. I don’t think some people quite grasp the concept of the speed at which I think and write. Oh well.
    BigBoysOven: Thanks, buddy! 🙂
    clementwpy: Appreciate the support, my friend. 🙂
    ~J0hN @nG~: I don’t know. It’s more on a company level in my case. But I never reveal where I work so I don’t know why it should be an issue. Neither do I blog about work related stuff.
    Kampongboy: Thanks, my friend. Appreciate the support. That’s some powerful motivational talk there indeed. It was your comment that started me thinking about the possibilities out there. Cheers for that!
    Brian: Cheers buddy! Yeah, if people can’t accept me for who I am, then it’s not my problem, it’s theirs. Everyone has skeletons in their closet. They just don’t take photos of said skeletons and publish it on a blog. 😉
    cheez: Thanks for reading. I also got a lot of emails (which I’m still in the process of replying) from other people with children who has problems with substance use seeking advice on rehab. I’ll like to think I’m helping by giving them the contacts of the rehabs I’ve been too that I can vouch for. I must emphasize that to quit, the user MUST want to quit him/herself. You can’t force someone to quit. It doesn’t work that way. I don’t agree with the AA/NA method of confrontation.
    Thanks for the support! 🙂
    3POINT8: Yeah, I agree. 🙂
    Secret Admire: Thanks D, I appreciate the vote of confidence. 🙂
    e: I kinda work in a creative department, so it’s important to be able to think out of the box. Now it’s up to them. Balls in their court. It always has been, come to think of it.
    KX: OMG!!!! You’re her younger brother! I’ve heard about you from Grace. How is she? I haven’t heard from her in a long time.
    Thanks for the support, bro.
    goolooloo: Rehab is for quitters! 😉
    Oops…wrong quote. Thanks for the tough love, Mary. I’m not a quitter. Never have been, never will. We Aries are a species of survivors.
    bengbeng: Cheers! Appreciate the support, mate.
    kongkay: At least it’s not as bad as the front page feature of Harian Metro Ahad with full color photos of me doing the stuff. Jesus Christ, that was bad. Sensationalism at it’s very best. I still remember the title – Laman Web Dajal (Evil website). 😉
    Grant S. (Intensecure): I’ve used that word more than once. I can’t remember where I picked it up. I think we call them Chinese whispers too.
    Thanks for the support, my friend.
    Tom: Thanks buddy. It’s not the writer’s fault though, I agreed to the interview and knew it was subject to a final edit. I take all credit and blame for the consequences. 🙂
    Cheers again for the support!
    Jungleman: Well, I take all credit (and blame) that comes with it. I agreed to do the interview without insisting on them focusing on my answers with regards to rehabilitation changing me. Guess I have to be more careful in the future. 🙂
    Thanks for the support, mate!
    Rufus: Thanks buddy! Yeah, Harian Metro and all that. Haha!
    nkwai: Cheers! I will survive, no doubt about it. 🙂
    Been through worse, and what doesn’t kill me will only make me stronger.

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  24. i kind of remember reading all those posts in the past years, but i am really happy for you that it is over now and you are back with spanking clean posts! 😀

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  25. Hey there HB,
    Every thing will be fine. I always believe in second chance. Just be what you are now. Please take care of yourself and whatever happens, pls remember that you always have friends and families who will always support you… Cheers…

    Reply
  26. I agree with what jungleman said. Hello~~~ jungleman, how are you? What a great tactic to get fame.
    Good luck buddy. Even nowadays too many bloggers, you are still the few of the great ones. Yah, I know you are not a quitter, the way you turn your life have proved it.
    I hope you employer see the positive sides of you as a creative, worthwhile employee. Not just thinking about the most black moments in your life.

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  27. xin: Thanks! I appreciate the vote of confidence. 🙂
    It’s really nice to have the old readers being so supportive. I’m touched, I mean it. Cheers!
    Bubble7866: Yeah, I’m not worried anymore. Everything happens for a reason (or so I’ve been told). I’m not concerned. I prefer working with people who appreciate my skill set which is why I love working with my current manager.
    fish fish: Thanks fish fish! 🙂
    You’ve always been there for me, appreciate that!
    Very supportive. Cheers!

    Reply
  28. jessy: Thanks for the vote of confidence jessy. Things should work out alright, a couple of things I need to do on my end to take the heat off myself, that’s all. Cheers! 🙂

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  29. Rin: Thanks mate! 🙂
    I’ll be sure to do that. I’m not sure I should be going to Miri anymore though in light of recent events which will be disclosed at a later stage at sixthseal.com. 😉

    Reply
  30. This is late, but you know the cliche: Better late than…
    Anyway, I would be disappointed if someone with your intelligence and abilities let a little setback like this take you down. If I may sound slightly pompous here (just take this the right way, ya?), this just speaks volumes on how far you’ve come emotionally and mentally since those dark days! Exhilarating as they were, it’s nothing when compared with stability.
    So cheers! I look forward to many more postings, pharmaceutical related or not. =)

    Reply
  31. I have been reading your blog for the longest time and since you disappeared I’ve just found it again. Rehab sounded like fucking hell but atleast you seem to be on the right track now
    keep keepin it real

    Reply
  32. Ash: Thanks Ash! 🙂
    m: It wasn’t hell but it sure was purgotary. :S
    It wasn’t a very fun experience, but at least I’m sober now. 🙂
    Thanks for reading m!

    Reply
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