Mysterious mysteries: The Narcotics police bought me a burger instead of me paying them off

police burger

Hot damn! I went to the friendly local neighborhood Ramly Burger stall and ordered a Double Chicken Special Cheese (RM 5.20) for my supper. I was prepared to fork out that amount coz I’m a little sick of eating bread with marmalade every meal.

Anyway, while the dude was flipping my burgers, this van pulled up with a PDRM insignia in all its glory emblazoned on the side of the vehicle. The car plate was WXX 28XX and it offloaded four (4) people – one in police uniform. The others were drunk, judging from their gravy stained shirts and the offhanded way they were consuming their lok-lok.

Well, one of them struck up a conversation with me – small talk, mainly about burgers and stuff. I found out that they are from the Narcotics Division of Bukit Aman (I shit you not) and they acted like they owned the place. I was a bit miffed when the burger guy served them first, and was about to voice out my displeasure at the preferential treatment when the alpha male slapped a RM 50 note down and said everything is on him.

There were about 7 people there – the four police (high ranking ones judging from their attire and attitude), myself, and two kids. The top dog paid for all of us, making a circular gesture with his forefinger to indicate that everything is on him. I wanted to pay my share but the burger guy refused payment – “Boss belanja“, so I reckon they must be regulars as well.

Thus, I nodded at the man who paid for my burger and said thank you. He smiled (in a rather inebriated manner) and waved it off with a shrug.

In Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, you don’t pay the police in the Narcotics Division. The police in the Narcotics Division pays YOU!

(or at least buy you a burger)

I love KL!!! =D

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42 thoughts on “Mysterious mysteries: The Narcotics police bought me a burger instead of me paying them off”

  1. Dude you are so lucky, you must be like me. Even though twenty years younger than I am. ( now age 50) My Dad was a Cop. And military. ( as I was, for awhile) as were most of his brothers. And many cousins of mine. I must tell you, HB, I feel great. can sleep lying down flat, on either side, etc. Broke ribs are done with fore now, as is my left arm. But what a wierd thing. I was proud of the heroic actions of the crew an Captian of the Musak Alabama, but I wonder why, or what terrible conditions prompt these guys to take such desperate actions. Something is wrong. Shit, I woud not do it. Easy prey? These guys risked all, just to secure something for their families. Those are the conditions we must addres. But a pussy way out? I think not. There will always be guys who want cheap riches fast. Freigheters and tankers need to carry guns. Wont be be waaiting for “Pirates of the Caraben 4″ for sure. But I already live in NC (US) and know that most of the pirate lore is worng. They were a bunch of viscious crimminals, not at all like Jonny Depp. I trust in the Lord, but sleep with a .38 in my night stand. Not for me , but to protect the innocent. Thanks HB, for the ocassional thought while I was healing up. As Willie Nelson sings, ” you were always on my mind”. God Bless but be careful out there. The world can ill aford to lose any more like you. You are worth a shit.
    Tom

  2. While I was writting the last, some one was looking over my shoulder. She said, ” what a terrible thing to imply” . What, I said ? She espalained to me. You are compareing him to yourself. OK Sorry. You are worth a shit, and I hope I can be as good as you. Or we can be Good together. No judgement meant. Lord knows, I got a bunch of faults of my own. Have a nice day HB. Take care, and dont do any thing I would not( that dont preclude much You know)
    God Bless
    Tom

  3. Very very lucky you. I’ve met them 3 times, and twice they asked money from me. Even when I showed them I left only RM13 in my purse (I was a poor student that time :P), that darn arse took RM10 and left the rest.

  4. HOLY SHIT! This would be my first time hearing Polis giving the public money, instead of the other way round!
    Haha, HB if you knew that the Polis was gona belanja you, you should have ordered the most expensive one and get a few more packed, eat tomorrow!

  5. What?! Where is this burger stall located? I am heading down to KL soon :P I want free burgers too. I just posted about burgers yesterday, and you are talking about free burgers.. HAHA!
    I reckon, Narcotics police officers are more generous than their other colleagues? :P

  6. Ahh thats life in the big the KL smoke. And as they say…”You never know your luck in the big city”
    Shit..I wonder if they bust down the door on your place for a search..maybe they give you a new laptop?

  7. aaah you see, despite all the misfortunes you get, there’s always a cloud with silver lining somewhere… and this time it HAD to come through the Narcotics Division, eh?
    Talk about being ironic, given your past :P

  8. wahahhaha… just as u least expected it.. of all the people – the Narcotics police bought you a burger! triple :P
    p/s : your laptop’s so similar to mine.. which Inspiron is that?

  9. Simon Seow: I would pretty much assume so…
    kimberlycun: Haha! Thanks for the morning laugh, Kim. :)
    Eh, I tried again last night – the burger stall was not in sight, but there was a truck labelled MPPJ in its place so I assume the burger dude didn’t tought it was wise to operate without a license.
    suanie: Indeed. Sweet taste of victory. I’m eating RM 5.20 from the RM 30,000 I forked out. Mmm…
    ah loon: Yeah, I tend to get into interesting situations. ;)
    calvaryzone: Indeed. Well, they used to read my blog, that was how I got busted for possession last time. I don’t know if they still do, but I’m clean now so there’s no reason to get me. :)
    cheesie: WTF! They don’t sell that here. I gotta check it out…chicken and prawn burger, sounds good. Where ah?
    ShaolinTiger: LOL! I did try again last night, but the burger sellers were gone and so was the DVD seller. An MPPJ truck was in it’s place. :)
    shaoweii: A truck did show up last night, but it was an MPPJ enforcement truck. ;)
    tom robinson: I’m glad you’re doing better, my friend.
    I love that phrase – I trust in the Lord, but sleep with a .38 in my night stand. :)
    …and no worries tom. I think we DO have a lot in common, and I didn’t think you were implying anything negative at all.
    You take care too, and have a great week ahead! :)
    chefmel: Nope, it didn’t hurt my pocket one single bit. Haha! I should have ordered two and chunk the other one into the fridge and microwave it the next day for breakfast. ;)
    JW: Yes, me too. I had to pinch myself to see if I was dreaming. ;)
    Jenn: Yeah, I was lucky. I’m usually the one forking out the cash too. They’re actually quite smart – they don’t accept cash nowadays, they ask you to open a bank account, bank the money in, give them the ATM card and PIN number and they withdraw at their leisure. :(
    RM 10 for narcotics? I’ve never heard of them accepting amounts that low.
    The last time I got caught, I offered RM 3,000 (all I had on me) and the dude told me, I’m an inspector, you think 3k can buy me? Add another 0 and then we’ll talk.
    Jesus fucking Christ.
    Darren: Yeah, me too! Oh wait, there was once a nice sarge fron Narcotics bought me lunch coz he knew his fellow inpector was sqeezing me dry. :(
    Marlboro Guy: Indeed, happens only in very rare occasions when the stars and moons align. With strange aeons, even Death may die stuff. ;)
    It was the most expensive one. It comes with two chicken patties, egg, and cheese. RM 5.20 is the top of the line stuff at Ramly. :)
    I should have bought more though, didn’t think of that then. Could have reheated it and ate it the next day. ;)
    bongkersz: I can’t tell you here, but it’s in PJ just down the condo from where I live.
    Narcotics? Hmm…I wouldn’t know but I bet Narcotics and D7 are in the highest unofficial income bracket of our police department. ;)
    xes: Yes, wonders of wonders, mate. :)
    shadowking: …but I had a run of serious bad luck just a couple of weeks ago.
    It’s karma’s way of balancing things out I guess.
    Or maybe Lady Luck is bipolar. :S
    michaelooi: Indeed, my friend. I could hardly believe it myself…but then again they were drunk and inebrieted people tend to be more generous. :)
    d: Yeah, very wierd stuff indeed. Twilight Zone episode. ;)
    YilingL: Haha! Yeah, it should go on the Guiness Book of World Records (or at least the Malaysian Book of Records). My name would be in it!
    …and I don’t have to choke on 7 Ferrero Rocher chocolates to get in too. ;)
    Jeff: Very true, my friend. That’s why I love KL. You never know what’s gonna happen next. :)
    No they won’t, they take stuff from you. I remember the previous raid, the narcotics people asked “Can I have this” for several items in my apartment – my taser, a tanto blade, and even my thumbdrives!
    You can’t actually say no when they’re ransacking your place. :(
    tzia: Indeed, I bet they can earn more in a single bust than I do in two years if they catch a big enough fish and do the environmentally friendly “Catch and Release” recreational fishing techniques. ;)
    fred: Haha! Yeah mate, first time.
    …but I was close to the sarge who busted me (for good reasons, and for real), and also close to the inspector (not for real, it was more of a financial arrangment to protect me from being arrested again).
    Yatz: Only if they’re not busting you. ;)
    fred: Repeat commments? There’s none in this post. No worries mate. :)
    yapthomas: Very generous? I like. Bring me next time, I gotta rub shoulders with the high ranking people in Narcotics.
    You know, just in case. ;)
    chriso: Indeed! I think Lady Luck is just bipolar – she swings from extreme bad luck to extreme good luck. I’m now in her manic states. ;)
    Cheryl: Yup, and just when I needed it the most too. ;)
    Erm…the one on the left is actually my work notebook. Deel Inspiron dunno what model running on Windows Vista. The one on the right is my personal one – Compaq running on Windows XP. :)

  10. Nice one :) And seems like a free lunch does happen sometimes!
    Have to scold you tho (sorry auntiness coming out). You really need to do a little cooking! With RM5 you could get like 10 eggs, and some onions, tomatoes and garlic to make a big omelette to go with your bread. And have eggs left over for 2-3 more omelettes/fried eggs/etc.
    For sure you’re going to get completely sick of bread and marmalade – that’s mostly just sugar and starch – anyone would give up that diet quickly.
    Buy cans of beans, tuna, soup…
    peace :)

  11. Fist of Asia: Cheers mate! :)
    It means a lot to me. :)
    Robb: Haha! No la mate, I don’t dare. I still have a possession record and an assault record (which is seriously not my fault, I admit to the former but not to the latter).
    julian: Yup, sometimes good things happen. :)
    Thanks for the tip Julian, I shall try that. Eggs is good, I love eggs. :)
    Jys: Indeed! It was my lucky day. :)

  12. Then I think I know which burger stall you are talking about. There’s only one besides the road. Ahaks, sure D7 is lucrative goldmine. Vice, gambling, secret societies..

  13. bongkersz: There are two right now, for some reason. One is a newbie stall, one man behind the stall, the burgers are inferior to this one.
    pm: I just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time, that’s all. :)

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