Reflections

Disclaimer: This post and all other drug related posts is made by veritas, who is a guest author on this blog. The owner of this domain is not responsible for the posts made by any guest authors.

I wasn’t feeling too good due to my binge on dexamphetamine. How is
that possible when I’ve nearly finished my stash a couple of days ago,
you ask? Well, I have acquired some more from…ah, the ‘diverted
pharmaceuticals’ market you if you get what I mean. ;) I’ll be
refilling my legitimate script this Friday anyway, so more is coming
in, no worries. I am concerned that I like this stuff a little too much
though, so I’m going to reflect very hard on that.

My concern is due to the way I binge on these tiny white pills for
days, forgoing sleep and food. I guess some personalities naturally
have an affinity to stimulants, making it hard control consumption.
Some serious reflection is needed indeed to manage my usage. I know
binging is usual behavior for speed freaks but I’ll like to keep my
usage experimental and recreational instead of becoming dependant on
the stuff. By the end of the run, I was getting paranoid an slightly
delusional. I’m seeing a greenish tint on my hands too whenever I look
at them and visual distortions everywhere.

I actually had 100 mg of Valium (diazepam) and stayed awake after my
speed binge. That kind of tolerance is not unheard of, but it’s
unacceptable to me, so I’m going to watch my benzo usage as well. I
don’t feel guilty about smoking cannabis daily though, due to its
comparatively benign nature. I think at some point you have to give
yourself a critical appraisal and evaluate whether you’re still a
recreational drug user or becoming dependant on them, regardless of
whether it’s pharmaceuticals or prohibited ones.

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