This is a container of Stone Age sunflower kernel chocolate candies. It’s a product of Korea.
Here’s what the multi-colored chocolate coated sunflower kernels looks like.
Q: What’s wrong with this picture?
A: Product may contain traces of nuts. π
Note: Ionamin 30 (30 mg phentermine resin capsules) should never
under any circumstances be ingested…unless you have nothing else.
*sigh* It’s dirty as fuck, and you’ll regret it very much. It takes a
very desperate tweaker (the kind that looks around the floor for any
dropped bits of crystal meth when the stash is finished) to resort to
the appallingly inferior phentermine and you will feel very ashamed of
yourself afterwards. It’s also very hard on the cardiovascular system,
since you’ll have to take high doses to get slightly stimulated (if you
have tolerance, personally I have to grind up 8 capsules (240 mg – this
is not a dosage guide!)) and that barely gives me the wanted effects
and each booster dose drives you closer to Paranoia, Population
378,378. It’s even worse than methamphetamine in that sense, and it’s
very likely that you’ll start thinking that the ink stain on your hand
is a nasty insect (visuals starts early with this one) and jump while
trying to brush it off frantically.
Currently thinking: “Why, oh why, did I finish the weekend’s ration of crystal meth so quickly?”
Also thinking: “What are the fucking chances of two contacts
being arrested a week apart? God? Can you hear me? I’m running out of
contacts for crystal meth! Please send down half a gram using your much
lauded Devine Lightning Logistics (DLL) Private Limited (TM) delivery
system. God? You there? Have thou forsaken me? Your only Son!”
/me dodges the wrathful smiting hand of God.
God: That’s enough blasphemy for one day. Don’t make me come down there and rip you a new one, asshole! Oh, and it was my
divine work *preens* that’s striking the fear of God (that’s yours
truly) into the hearts of dealers in Kuching by the insistent string of
arrests. Your new contact is also in jail. Should you attempt to source
another one tonight, it is my Divine Will that you will be next to join
them. Just eat those damned Ionamin capsules, they are part of my
divine creation too, ignorant mortal, and I’m rather proud of them, so
you should be too. Be content with what you have! Bo hu, he mah eh sai,
right? Go to church tomorrow, and repent for your sins and I’ll take
your request into my divine consideration. Go forth, and I will make
you fishers of meth! Oops…I mean, fishers of men. My bad.
Disclaimer: Obviously the conversation with God did not take
place (it’s called embellishment), thus by inference and extrapolation,
everything else in this post is fictional too. Ignore the logical
fallacy in the previous statement. I, upstanding citizen of Malaysia,
has never touched methamphetamine in my life. I also do not possess any
other illicit drugs or controlled substances without a valid
prescription. The image above is Photoshopped.
It doesn’t look Photoshopped and you don’t have the skillz to do that kind of thing anyway!
Okay, so it’s not Photoshopped, but I have a valid prescription for Ionamin. It’s for…er, my obesity.
You’re not even fat!!!
Well, there you go. The wonders of modern medicine.