TLC – Tender(izing) Loving Care

massage

Would you like to be worked on like a piece of prime Kyoto beef, massaged and then tenderized before being cooked by hot stones? If your answer is a resounding (or doubtful) yes, you’ve come to the right place! Welcome Sir Moo, to Vila Manja!

manja

Vila Manja is located in Jalan Damai, off Jalan Tun Razak along the multitudes of foreign embassies in that area. Nestled in a quiet alcove which is a converted bungalow, it offers spa and massage packages ranging from foot reflexology to full day pampering sessions that probably only Datins can afford on a regular basis.

beware

The place is amazingly Zen (one of my lame puns) with a water feature I like to call a Sobriety Test (TM) coz you need to be reasonably unimpaired to navigate the stepping stones lest you wind up with the dreaded soaked sneaker. >.<

zen

The interior of the spa is inviting, exuding warmth and ambient lighting. I felt like a baby going back to the womb as I disrobed and started to lie down on the massage table. There is a sarong of sorts covering me to preserve some semblance of propriety and the scented massage oil made the masseur’s skilled fingers feel like a thousand little butterflies gliding across my skin.

spa inside

Bliss! My oasis of peace.

spa

I experienced a Moment of Truth (TM) – a glimpse of the mysteries behind life, the universe and everything before the overwhelming knowledge (and the masseur’s caresses) drove me into a slumber. I am sad to report that I forgot everything about the meaning of life when I woke up, except it was a number. I think it was 6 but then again it could be 4+2 or 42. *shrugs*

food

I adjourned downstairs to join the others for lunch…and a presentation by Fiona on PRUhealth, a new medical plan that Prudential has launched.

presentation

The affable Fiona explained that the average lifespan for Malaysians is 71.7 for males and 76.5 for females. You probably know females live longer than males – the mysterious XX Chromosome factor. Both my grandfathers (maternal and paternal) are six feet under while both my grandmothers are still alive and kicking.

I don’t think I’ll live to see the big 50, but with me as a stellar example; people are getting sick earlier and earlier. New age and lifestyle related illnesses like stroke, blood sugar ultra, diabetes and heart disease is on the increase (hey, it rhymes) and you get more susceptible to it as you grow older.

Coupled with inflation, you can imagine how much a heart bypass (or kidney transplant for me) will cost when you’re old. I really need to get on an insurance plan lest my (forthcoming) kids decide I’ll be better off in a retirement home – out of sight, out of mind. πŸ˜‰

Okay, here’s another thing about their flexible plan – you can remove the annuals claims limit so you can claim up to the lifetime limit. This would be mighty useful if *knocks on wood* you need to go for major surgery which would exceed the limit of most insurance plans.

fiona

I think this is a great idea since you’ll probably only need to go for one of these procedures once in your lifetime. PRUhealth allows you to claim up to the lifetime limit so you won’t hit the ceiling of the claims limit per year with their special rider plan.

group

It starts from a minimum monthly premium of RM 100 (actual premium will depend on your age and the type of plan you select) and covers you up to age 100. I doubt you’ll live that long, but if you do, hey, don’t forget to give a shout out to me in the Guinness Book of World Records.

snip

…or I’ll snip your finger off. ROAR! πŸ˜‰

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

25 thoughts on “TLC – Tender(izing) Loving Care”

  1. So… the spa, massage, and food was provided by an insurance company eh? From my experience, that fits the normal squence of events. Now get ready for a good, f__king, ’cause that’s what most of them have done to almost every one I know.

    Reply
  2. terenceg: Yeah bro, a massage does wonders! I haven’t been to one since this. I used to go pretty often, I like the ones where they work my muscles until I feel like I’ve been beaten up really bad. πŸ˜‰
    tom: Heh! Sorry to hear about your experience my friend. πŸ™‚
    Simon Seow: Me too! I went for the relaxing one though, I prefer the ones with strong people beating me up (my muscles anyway). πŸ™‚
    jg: Everything Zen, everything Zen! It was, there are hot stone treatments and what not too! πŸ™‚
    seth.frostheart: Yeah, I know what you mean mate. It’s rare to find massage places WITHOUT a happy ending but WITH good strong people working your muscles. I know one from my hometown, fuyoh, that woman can really work your back. I think she has supressed anger issues, but it works for me. πŸ˜‰
    cindy khor: Yeah, give me a buzz when you get back then! We shall go for the massage! πŸ™‚
    eiling: Hey, you know of any good ones in KL? Where they actually do serious massages and not just touch you? I need that for my bad posture, it’s been giving me back pain. :S

    Reply
  3. Somehow, in a weird way, your post’s title (TLC) reminded me of one of my biology classes. First thing came to mind was… “papaya as a meat tenderiser”. Papaya’s papain enzyme is credited for it’s ability to break down meat’s tough fibres. I wonder if it might just work on humans. Hmm… :O

    Reply
  4. Cheers: Interesting! I know it’s good for regulating bowel movements. I don’t have the thing that you beat meat with so I just use the meat tenderizer instead. πŸ™‚
    I hear the tool works better.

    Reply
  5. Have to agree with Tom on the “sequence of events”.
    Insurance has a different set of interests from ours, it’s all about bottom line and is in conflict with ours. They’re good as long as you’re young and don’t need them, and will fuck you up big time if you’re getting an acute disease requring long term care.
    All you have to do is to ask if they would insure grandma of 80 let’s say or if you’re a woman and pregnant.

    Reply
  6. Sorry if I offended any one HB. In the US, we are in the midst of a huge healthcare debate. ( to the point where one congressman called the president a damn liar, during a televised speech in congress. Some persons want government systems, some want insurance funded programs.I dont have any, right now, so I am for the former. ( I applied, but because of health history, from 15 years ago) would cost me about 950. usd per month, for a limited indvidual policy, if I could get it at all. You can get free insurance for your kids (

    Reply
  7. Ha. LOL, HB. Alot of your stuff just plain makes me laugh. At how different we all are,and yet the same. And thats a good thing. one last word on insurance. Watch out when you might have to collect on disability plans. All I can say about it on your blog is I lost my taste for duck. AFLAxxx squash. Never again. after a 16 month fight, I got 6 years of premiums back, plus 500 bucks. Be well, and keep writting. I like the mini vacation pics ofasnd your friends and you. Particularly the one where you look like shamo ( no offense, your not fat, just propped up on the edge of the pool) at sea world. Why not a book? Tom

    Reply
  8. you know, its like tomecho said. They are a for profit industry, and require oversight. Hell even non profits and charities require that. At least to make them divulge finanaces. There is a local charity I used to give to monthly. not much. 15 bucks. They do a good job. But I found that the leader was getting ( or the board was paying him πŸ˜‰ a salary of almost 100k per year. plus had 4 on his staff making > 50k per year. his defence, ( well i over see almost 2 million, and … and … comaprable jobs in insustry command that much. Thats ALOT of money around here. Best I ever made, in a single year, was about 38k. And that was with ALOT of overtime. I made 15.35 per hour, as a supervisor, with a technical bs degree. most persons that worked on my shift made 10- 12. My sister works for salvation army, and has for the last 1o years. she makes about 32k a year as finance director, grant writter, etc for 2 counties. She is almost a CPA, and went back to school at age 42. I asked her about it, and she laughed. Then said I handle about 4.5 mil in contrbutions per year. Tell him if you want to get rich, you are in the wrong job, unless you want to take advantage of human misery. Good advice. Tom

    Reply
  9. kenwooi: Yeah, it’s not too bad, you should hit one someday. The ones who really do a number on you are the best! Big strong women. =D
    KY: Heh! Me too, it was so good I fell asleep. :S
    hitomi: My fingers are alway chubby what…like my face. Haha! πŸ™‚
    TomEcho: Yeah, it is a corporation after all. πŸ˜‰
    e: Haha! Not that kind of meat! I mean the strong hands who do proper massages that leaves you walking out the door feeling like someone beat you up inside. πŸ˜‰
    Michelle: Bali and Thailand are good places for massages! Certain other parts of Indonesia too! πŸ™‚
    tom: Heh! Yeah, I know what you mean my friend. Very interesting take on things. πŸ™‚
    I am writing a book – have one completed already, but no publisher would touch it though. It seems a mite too controversial for the publishers here without a “morally sound ending” which is bullshit coz in real life there are no happy endings where I can impart a dash of wisdom, only what happens and that’s that.
    Too bad a lot of publishers don’t understand that.
    ahlost: So do I, it’s been too long! πŸ™
    suituapui: Hey, Thai Spa in Sibu is pretty good. You have to ask for one woman though, forgot her name, she’s quite heftily built and she really does the job. Strong hands, damn near broke my spine one time. πŸ˜‰
    eiling: Awesome! Thanks Eiling! πŸ™‚

    Reply

Leave a Reply to cindy khor Cancel reply