Kai Sing Guo (Fruit of happiness)

Afternote: Kai Sing Guo = Nimetazepam (a benzodiazepine). The pills are brand name Erimin-5 pills. Read this [sixthseal.com] for more info.

What exactly is this thing? I acquired one of this tonight for RM 15
(A$ 7.50). The local street name here is “kai sing guo” which literally
translates to “fruit of happiness”. It’s definitely a pharmaceutical of
some sort, but I didn’t get it from a pharmacy if you get what I mean.
It’s mainly used here to ease the come down from methamphetamines
(people use it to sleep after taking meth pills). A search of
rxlist.com returned two probable matches – Phenobarbital (a
barbiturate) and Clonazepam (a benzodiazepine). If anyone could shed
some light on what exactly this is, I’ll be very appreciative. Educated
guesses will do. I took several pictures of it:

ksg1.jpg

This is the front of the wrapping. It has perforated edges, which
suggests it’s part of a larger set of similar pills. The color of the
front is red and there is a “5”, the logo that looks like a four leaved
clover/square cross, and “028” in BLACK font near the bottom of the
wrapping. It’s not visible in this picture.

ksg2.jpg

The back of the wrapping is silver in color with the “5”, the logo
that looks like a four leaved clover/square cross, and “028” in RED
font.

ksg3.jpg

The front of the pill has a “5” imprinted and is a pink-ish color. The pill has beveled edges and no score.

ksg4.jpg

The back of the pill has the logo that looks like a four leaved
clover/square cross and “028” imprinted. The pill has beveled edges and
no score.

Trip report

Time: 1:50 am
Method of ingestion: Crunched up on a fairly empty stomach
Taste: The pill tasted sweet (?) with a slightly bitter aftertaste.

1:55 am
a slight benzo feeling…numb fingers, blood rushing to the head/face region

1:28 am
sweaty palms, average loss on inhibition as if i’ve had a couple of drinks

2:05 am
hmm…feeling mildly drunk and rather much loss of inhibition. didn’t
have to think about anything if i didn’t want to, much like benzos.
slightly floaty.

2:09 am
eh, a mild hallucinogen effect when in partial darkness. face morphed
slightly and there were mild tracers when i moved my head. higher level
cognition is still intact. sounds sound better too, more 3d?

2:14 am
palms and feet sweaty. sounds sounds much louder than in real life. starting to feel somewhat drunk.

2:18 am
am i reading too much into it? feels very mildly hallucinogic in relative darkness

2:23 am
feeling very warm – definite rise in body temperature.

2:36 am
smoking felt reallly good. mesmerized by the smoke tendrils from the
cigarette. hypnotized by my feet when i took a bath. noticed more
attention to detail, like a roll of used toilet paper that was under
the door of my toilet. my eyes kept on going to it. brushing my teeth
made me notice my hands and toothbrush. closed eyes has a reddish tint.
not sure if my pupils are dilated – did look in the mirror, maybe only
slightly dilated. afterimages slightly prominent, like when i looked at
the monitor and then covered my face with a towel, the afterimage is
still there. is that also true when sober? i’ll try tomorrow.

3:00 am
feeling rather introspective. quite easily spooked too. :)

3:20 am
return to baseline? feeling slightly drowsy now. should be able to fall asleep if i want to

4:36 am
sorry for the infrequent updates, i could not update as frequently as i
wanted due to reasons i won’t explain (not drug related). my higher
level cognitive skills were intact. i am not at liberty to divulge
information too much information but something could have happened and
i choose for it not to. btw, this substance started out slightly
stimulating and ended up being a downer. feeling sleepy now. my guess
is that it’s some sort of short acting benzo, but i can’t be sure coz
there were some interesting qualities that were not benzo like.

P/S – Any help in identifying this pill from someone who has tried it will be very much appreciated.

Xany Xanax

xanaxfrt.jpg
Mmm…Xanax

I’ve always wanted to try Xanax coz the 2mg bars just looks so sexy.
Thus, I decided to go shopping for some Xanax today. It’s a relatively
short acting benzodiazepine. Xanax is the same drug that Noelle Bush
(the niece of the current United States president George Bush) was
arrested for because she tried to pass off a fraudulent prescription
[cnn.com]. The first pharmacy I went to regarded me with suspicion when
I asked for Xanax. They didn’t want to sell it without a prescription
and told me to get some at the clinic instead. I got a general feeling
of not being welcome the moment I mentioned Xanax.

The second pharmacy I went to was more accommodating. They didn’t
know what Xanax was and asked me to write down the name of a piece of
paper. I wrote down Xanax, Alzoram (the Malaysian generic brand name)
and Alprazolam (the chemical name). The old lady there asked his son to
read the paper and he instantly recognized Alprazolam. He told the old
lady it’s sleeping pills (?) asked where it’s kept.

She said they have some at the back and he went over to rummage
about under a cabinet. I was feeling hopeful at this point, I didn’t
even get asked for my prescription script. He didn’t find any at the
back and rummaged about some more in a box of Handiplast (the st
bandage). He came out with a stack of blister packs tied together with
a rubber band from the box of Handiplast. Don’t ask me why it was kept
there, I was puzzled too.

xanaxbck.jpg
Xanax/alprazolam/0.25mg

The old lady asked me who the medication was for and I made up a
cock and bull story about doing an exhibition about benzodiazepines for
my university and I was going to stick one pill on a piece of manila
card. I don’t know if she actually believed that story (I had the
feeling she didn’t from the look on her face) but there was not
questions asked after that. I got the impression that this is a “no
questions asked” pharmacy if you catch my drift. The guy came back at
this point and asked me how many blister packs I wanted. I examined one
of the blister pack and saw that it’s brand name Xanax pills with each
tablet containing 0.25 mg of alprazolam. I was hoping that they carry
the beautiful 2 mg pills, but oh well, this will work perfectly well
too. There were 10 tablets in the blister pack, which comes to 2.5 mg.

I decided to just go for one blister pack and it was sold to me, for
RM7 (A$3.50). This is the brand name Xanax (alprazolam) marketed by
Upjohn pharmaceuticals (the old name, they have since merged with
Pharmacia). On a side note, I’ve read in the newspapers that being
caught with possession of Xanax pills without a prescription carries a
RM2000 fine and/or a 2 year jail. Someone who was caught with 24 pills
got that sentence recently. They were credited as “upjohn” pills
though, which further illustrates that mainstream journalism has their
heads planted firmly up their ass when reporting on technical or drug
issues. Upjohn is a pharmaceuticals company, not a drug name.

xanaxpill.jpg
Upjohn 29/single score at back

Trip Report

Substance name: Alprazolam (Xanax)
Street names: Z-bars, bars, Upjohn (in Malaysia)
Dosage: 2.5 mg (10 x 0.25 mg) taken orally in a mixture of
powder, broken off bits and whole pills. The pills seem rather crumbly
and some broke into pieces as soon as I pressed it from the blister
pack. I do not have any tolerance to benzodiazepines.
Usual recreational dosage for people with no benzodiazepine tolerance: 1-2 mg
Pills: White oval pills with Upjohn 29 imprinted on one side and
a single score on the other side. The pills have beveled edges. Each
pill contains 0.25 mg of alprazolam. They come in a blister pack
containing 10 pills for a total of 2.5 mg, if you eat them all.

T+ 0:00
I took all 10 pills at 11:00 pm sharp. The pills are in a mixture of
powder, bits of tablets and whole tablets. This was because the pills
are either very brittle or this is old stock so they break easily. The
tablets tasted like powdered mint (without any hint of sweetness) at
first and very bitter when i washed it down with water.
T+ 0:05
noticed some clumsiness and a heaviness in the head and a general feeling of being mildly stoned only 5 minutes later (!!!)
T+ 0:08
a feeling of not being very sober, but i can’t put my finger on what
exactly gave me this feeling of non-sobriety. i just feel not very
sober. the medical term for this is derealisation i believe.
T+ 0:14
mild nausea. a feeling of numbness in my extremities, especially the
fingers, very much like the feeling you get when you’re starting to get
drunk. Heaviness of the head is present all throughout the time.
T+ 0:18
feeling a kind of “super enhanced sight”. its like i can see every
movement i make is in full frame and with a high framerate. don’t
really know how to explain it besides this. it feels like the start of
a LSD trip visually, everything looks enhanced, colors stand out etc,
but this is very mild. clumsiness did not get any worse. numbness in
extremities still present.
T+ 0:20
a mild euphoria. not like ecstasy euphoria but more like codeine
euphoria. aka stupid euphoria. :) a better word will be contentment.
palms are feeling sweaty, which is peculiar for me since i seldom get
sweaty palms
T+ 0:22
pupils VERY dilated (?!?!?!) even in bright light. looking at myself in
the mirror feels wierd. uneven dilation. my left pupil is more dilated
than the right one.
T+ 0:30
feeling contented and relaxed. not much progression other than that.
feeling slightly disappointed due to high expectations. i’m more of a
fan of “fuck me up” drugs like LSD which provides cool visuals and
wierd trains of thoughts.
T+ 0:40
hmm…feeling slightly sleepy now.
T+ 0:43
er…i’m trying to fight this feeling of being sleepy. it’s getting stronger. heh.
T+ 0:50
i caught myself staring at a half eaten chocolate bar with a bit of
chocolate sticking out in an interesting manner. stop hypnotizing me
dammit.
T+ 1:00
yawn. i’m trying to keep an open mind but it seems that this is all
Xanax has to offer. a feeling of being (very) mildly drunk and
admittedly quite significant relaxation. not much euphoria to speak of.
valium (another benzodiazepine) provides much more euphoria compared to
this.
T+ 1:10
wtf? i feel myself returning to baseline already. baseline = normal (sober) state
T+ 1:15
i still felt slightly clumsy and my body feels heavier than usual when
walking. not much more numbness in the fingers and i’m still feeling
sleepy.
T+ 1:20
noticed some problems with memory. i dropped my cell phone to the floor
earlier and didn’t remember to retrieve it until 30 minutes later.
T+ 1:26
hehehe
walking arond in the dark with my arms swinging freaked me out
considerably. and i thought Xanax was supposed to be prescribed for
anxiety and panic attacks. =D
T+ 1:30
feeling close to baseline now. i suspect i’ll have a nice deep sleep later tonight too. :)
T+ 1:40
a nice afterglow can be felt. still feeling contended and happy.
walking still feels a bit strange, but nice. i just noticed that time
passes pretty damn fast on Xanax. i didn’t even notice that nearly 2
hours have passed since i took the pills. hmm…i wonder what i did in
those two hours since it didn’t felt like i did much at all. :)
T+ 2:20
i did another time jump. don’t ask me where the past 40 minutes went, coz i seriously don’t know. i wasn’t even doing anything.

Afternotes:
I don’t see the appeal in taking Xanax by itself. It’s basically just a
chill pill, and I’m not into this particular class of drugs. I can see
its value in helping with meth/coke/other stimulant comedowns, but when
taken on its own, it doesn’t have very much to offer. Possible good
combos will be Xanax + alcohol (be careful, a lot of deaths has been
attributed to this combination) and Xanax + cannabis (the sedative
effects will probably provide a nice synergy). Personally, I feel
Valium (diazepam) would be a much better alternative if you like
benzodiazepines. Valium actually gives pretty good euphoria when taken
in recreational doses. An interesting thing with Xanax is time seems to
go much faster. It’s almost as if time jumps forward. One minute you
look at the clock and it’s 2:15 am. You feel that only a minute has
passed but next time you look, the time is already 2:45 am and you’re
left scratching your head about what happened during the last 30
minutes coz you don’t remember doing anything at all. Huh? It happened
a lot of times during the trip too. Very bizarre.

Caution:
Being in possession of prescription drugs without a prescription could be against the law in your country.

Additional info site:
Always follow a doctor’s instructions when taking prescription medications like Xanax. Deviate from doctor’s orders and take more of the said drugs, and you might find yourself addicted to prescribed drugs in no time.

Valium

Hmm…I’ll make this short coz talking about this is depressing in itself.
Well, I’ve been suffering from bouts of depression every few months.
Usually, it’s tolerable, but sometimes, it comes with anxiety attacks,
which makes it somewhat hard to shake off. I had one of those two days ago
and went to see a doctor. I was diagnosed with clinical depression (low
serotonin levels) and prescribed some Diazepam (Valium). It comes in
yellow 5 mg tablets and I was told to take two while talking to the
doctor. It did help heaps with the anxiety, and I found that if I think
happy thoughts, it helps with the depression too. However, I was hit by
some wild ass mood swings when it started to wear off, so I’m not going to
take it again. Also, I admit I have an addictive personality so I’ll
rather stay off benzodiazepines. I haven’t taken it since then, I’ll
rather tough out my depressive episodes instead of relying on
pharmaceuticals. Oh well, look on the bright side. At least I have the
option of not taking anything and still not kill myself. Some people do
not have that luxury and need to take benzos or else they’ll become
suicidal. I’ve struggled with suicidal thoughts myself though, and in one
major depressive episode, I nearly did it. But I found out that running as
fast and as hard as you can until you collapse from exhaustion is a good
way to get your mind off things. That and praying. If you still feel
suicidal after that, sing (scream) as loud as you can to drown out those
thoughts and go somewhere where there are people around. I know that the
sheer desperation that occurs during depressive episodes is pretty
bad, but I’ve survived so far. =D Anyway, regarding yesterday’s post, I
was wondering whether moving to another halls will help. Change of
surroundings, you know. We’ll see. Hmm…now I’ll have to put a happier
post on top of this so I don’t have to see it when I load my page.

P/S – If you know me in real life, I don’t want to talk about this because
it makes me depressed. Thanks.

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