Looking for love in all the wrong places


I’ve been actively looking for a serious relationship since the last one didn’t work out. I’m sure I’m ready, I gave my all in the previous one and I guess the age thing is gnawing on me. I’m turning 31 in one day.

However, people have been telling me not to rush into a relationship…just chill and let it come when it comes.

I think they’re right. I hit on this girl just now at Hoofed and totally messed it up. Heh. I understand why though – I can’t even understand myself, so how can they (one of the girls in the group of two caught my eye) decipher my speech?

Tell me brother, what is the greatest jihad?

The most excellent jihad is that for the conquest of self. (Bukhari)

There are certain things that I would need to change and that would be the greatest jihad (struggle) of my life but I’ll be a better person when I’m done.

…and in the meantime, I’ll listen to you all and just chill.

The right person will come when she comes. πŸ™‚

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47 thoughts on “Looking for love in all the wrong places”

    • Haha! No, I’m not.

      Erm…maybe just a little bit. πŸ˜‰

      It can get a bit lonely sometimes. I’m pretty much okay on my own (that’s why I love to live alone) but since the last ex, I realize that I like living with someone I love more.

      Thanks Joyce! I shall wait for the right one to come along. πŸ˜€

    • Indeed bro. I heard the cover by another band too but I can’t remember which one exactly. πŸ™‚

      I think the best course of action is to wait for the right one to come along.

      Thanks Vincent! πŸ˜€

      • A-Teens in the cartoon feature, “Lilo & Stitch”…or the Chinese version by F4. LOL!!! UB40 did a reggae version of it too…and there has been lots of other covers as well.

  1. Ooooo…love this song! I think it’s country, by a guy named Johnny Lee – featured in the not-so-successful John Travolta movie, “Urban Cowboy”.

    Anyway, I do feel for you, buddy. Don’t worry about it, just go on living life to the fullest – it will come when it will come.

    Happy Birthday in advance, all good wishes in the year ahead.

    • Thanks mate!

      No worries, it was a Moment of Weakness (TM). I’m actually okay, a lot like rubber in that sense…bounce right back.

      Thanks for the birthday wishes bro! πŸ˜€

    • Nevermind I’ll find someone like you.

      Oh wait, that’s a stupid song to sing coz I don’t want someone like my ex. Haha!

      …but since we’re on the topic of songs. πŸ˜‰

  2. I understand that feeling bro. Wanted to get married at 27 which was my perfect age coz I figured having a kid at 28 would be ideal. Well life doesn’t always go as smoothly as we plan. I do thank my lucky stars coz I found the right one and got hitched at 30 last year.

    On a side note, hey, we’re of the same age, you and I

    • Hey, it all worked out for you! πŸ™‚

      Congrats bro! I didn’t know you were my age, but I’m really glad you found the right one and got married to her.

      All the best bro! πŸ™‚

    • I stopped looking already. πŸ™‚

      I’ll wait for the right person to come along and when she does I’ll be sure to hold on to her.

      Thanks for the birthday wishes Sherrie! πŸ˜€

  3. Happy Birthday in advance, HB.

    Time heals all wounds. I wish you all the best and may the right person come along very very soon. Stay happy always, and remember that you don’t need an external person to justify your happiness. Your true happiness lies within. πŸ™‚

    • Thanks for the words of encouragement again Jyannis! πŸ™‚

      It is always appreciated.

      Yup, each day is a gift and I’m going to treasure that. Thanks for reminding me that I don’t need someone to be happy.

      That’s very Zen, the bit about true happiness lying within yourself.

      Cheers! πŸ™‚

  4. Early birthday wishes, HB! I’m sure you’ll have an awesome day and a fantastic year – everything will fall in place in good time, friend. You’re soundiing a lot like Ted Mosby here though…. πŸ™‚ So let your inner Barney out n have a great time…

    • Thanks for the birthday wishes Kate! πŸ™‚


      Good one, the HIMYM reference. Yeah, gotta unleash the inner Barney once in a while. πŸ˜‰

      Cheers Kate!

  5. Hi. sorry to learn that you are still searching but remember each one of us has a different destiny. Would you believe that you decipher your destiny number from your date of birth? Heard the Power of numbers by Dr Oliver Tan.

    • Hmm…I’m not a huge believer in things like that.

      However, I do believe there’s someone out there for me…and if it doesn’t happen divinely, I’ll make it happen myself. πŸ™‚

      Thanks though mate!

  6. yah, sometimes, you just have to slow it down. Don’t be afraid that the girl will be taken, if she’s yours, someday, both of you will be together. πŸ˜‰
    Just a penny of my thoughts : Good thing comes to those who waits, alright? Be positive, stay happy, dono whether u know how to read this anot , δΊΊη”Ÿζœ‰ε€šε°‘δΈͺ十年? live everyday as if it were your last. hehee.. God loves u btw,…^^

    • Thanks for that mate! πŸ™‚

      Indeed, good thing comes to those who wait.

      …and cheers for that – I don’t read Chinese but I used Babelfish to translate it. I kinda got the gist of it.

      Live everyday as if it’s your last. I’m a huge proponent of that – it’s just hard to keep in mind sometimes when things are down.

      I’ll remember that. πŸ™‚

  7. First, let me start off by saying, an advanced Happy 31st Birthday to you and hope you’ve a good one.

    Second, don’t rush off into another relationship just because age is catching up as it’s never a good idea. I agree with Charmaine; you’ll meet the perfect, right one in the right place at the right time.

    • Thanks Ciana!

      Yup, I realize it’s a very bad idea now. I made the same mistake last Chinese New Year.

      However, I think sometimes mistakes can be made into opportunities. I’m still friends with my ex in Sibu and I do like her as a person. πŸ™‚

      Thanks for the support, I’ll be looking out for the right person at the right place and the right time. πŸ˜€

  8. As far as sex is concerned….

    trial and error.”

    Smooth and fair

    This place brings back memories.

    It’s yummy


    Camera Phone LOL!

    Bijan knee shaking already…

    narts ecomer

  9. But, but.., you are only 31 and still young. Remember 10 years ago when you were 21? And you thought you were getting old. 10 years from now, you will be thinking how young you were when you were in your 31.

    Never stop looking because you arestill young and available, afterall God gave us a pair of eyes for looking, mah.You’ll be surprise that someday you probably meet your future wife outside of the smelliest toilet with poop sticking under your sandals and hohoho..cupid strike! Never ever think that looking for love in all wrong places,ya. It’s all about plans from up there. But you also have to do your part la.Happy Birthday to you and don’t you forget to give your mommy a call on this day too. I am a mommy myself, and waiting for my child to wish me happiness on his ‘BIRTH-DAY’. Well, he’s still young to understand.

    Don’t like to leave comments, but I did. That’s because you are awesome to have an awesome blog. I can’t help but MUST comment lor.Good luck to you and be happy always.

    Take care and have a wonderful day yourself. πŸ˜‰

    • Thanks for the perspective check Yvonne! πŸ™‚

      Yup, I’m seeing things more clearly now. That’s a very apt analogy.

      Yeah, I did call home during my birthday. Hey, you’re a mom! Congrats and hope that your child will wish you happiness on his/her birthday for all eternity. πŸ˜€

      Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment. Have an awesome week ahead Yvonne!

  10. You don’t deserve anyone because of the people you hurt in the past.

    Any proper lady/woman would not dare to go near you.

    What’s leftovers are those who would play you like you played the other girls.

    • Well, you see that’s where you’re wrong. πŸ™‚

      I admit my mistakes in the past and I’ve always owned up to them. I don’t do that anymore and I’ve tried to make amends where I can.

      Anyway, it’s my birthday so since you’re clairvoyant and all, would you mind letting me know two 4D numbers from the top 3 for tomorrow’s draw?

      I sure would love to hit the jackpot. πŸ˜‰

  11. Hi HB,

    I’m glad to see how you have grown over the years (by reading your blog).
    Learn to love yourself and you realize Love has been there all along.
    When you know how to love, respect and appreciate yourself, you know how to love others and what you deserve.

    (I’ve been there, a bright girl who was self destructive from my teens to early 30s. Now a 38 y.o who is grateful to the signs and lessons)

  12. I’ve been actively looking for a serious relationship since the last one didn’t work out. I’m sure I’m ready, I gave my all in the previous one and I guess the age thing is gnawing on me. I’m turning 31 in one day.

  13. HUGE HIGH FIVE and a big ol’ amen to that, brother!! by the way? i’m the girl who was temping in gsc, ou who recognised you as “that blogger guy” who you asked to take a picture of who was smiling super awkwardly as you did. and yes, it sure has taken me this long to say hello but hey, they say better late than never(!) πŸ˜€ HELLO.


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