My little breakup story

I’m going to tell you my little breakup story. I arrived home to find the letterbox key slipped under the door. Hmm…I thought, surveying my surroundings. It seems a little on the empty side, but nothing out of the ordinary. I walked into the bedroom to find out that…

empty bed

…she had left (and taken my bed sheets with her). OMG! What am I going to sleep in tonight?

I went to take a bath with my newly purchased soap and threw the wrapper into the non-existent rubbish bin. It landed on the floor. I’m just so used to it being there that I didn’t look before I disposed of the wrapper. She had taken the rubbish bin AND the laundry bin as well. Ish.

no rubbish bin

Oh well, no biggie. I’ll deal with it tomorrow, not thinking that if so many things are missing, others have to be as well. I took a shower and went to sleep on my (sheet less) bed.

I woke up the next day, smoked my first cigarette of the day while looking at the traffic outside. I went back in to brush my teeth and found…

no toothpaste

…NO TOOTHPASTE!

I remember we had at least three (3) tubes stocked up and all of them were missing.

Man, this is just petty. Toothpaste? Crass…

search toothpate

I didn’t want to be late for work so I rummaged around and found some toiletries I liberated from random hotel rooms for use during budget travel. I usually take shaver kits and toothpaste kits.

found toothpaste

Eureka!

I texted her to tell her that taking all the toothpaste is just ridiculous.

She replied:

crass

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

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