I have received a few requests to compile a general list of the techniques (also known as skillz, mojo) I use to create content for my XX Chromosome entry. It has come to my attention that a lot of my readers are curious pertaining my methods of approaching and persuading a female (see synonym chicks, girls) to pose for a photograph to appear on sixthseal.com.
The sixthseal.com Guide to XX Chromosome posts
Approach a.k.a. Target acquisition
This is a very important, and often overlooked aspect of taking photos with strangers, especially girls. Your approach is key, since it’s the first impression you make. It helps if you don’t look like a stereotypical horny old man or gangster but even if you look like one, there are several disarming methods that can be applied.
Smile
A smile shows your friendly intent and Smashing Pumpkins sang “disarm me with a smile” for a reason.
Confidence
Look like it’s the most natural thing in the world to be asking for, without being overconfident, pushy, or overbearing. It’s fine to be friendly, but it’s not okay to be assertive in situations like this.
Eye contact
Also related to confidence, always make and maintain eye contact when you see someone you want to put in the XX Chromosome category. Never break eye contact first, it’s one of the rules of dating and also a cardinal rule in doing this. It makes you look unsure, shy, and even weak, not particularly attractive traits for a male.
Pitch
I tend to introduce myself first, touching the shoulder (the back and arms are fine too, but not other areas) to get the person’s attention if she has broken eye contact. I say something along the lines of “Hello, I’m Huai Bin, and I like the dress/uniform/shirt etc you’re wearing. You mind if I take a photo of you?”
It is important not to give misleading statements or potential minefields e.g. “I like you” but go for the non-animated stuff e.g. clothes, hair, eyes etc. I noticed that I have never gotten a “No” for an answer if I have already pulled out my digicam. It’s this thing about people and handshakes – it’s like how you never see someone NOT shake your hand when you’ve already offered it. It’s something of an automatic gesture.
Lead in
Take one or two photos of the girl and then grab a bystander and tell the girl something along the lines of “Hang on a second, I want to take a photo with you too” and give your digicam to a passerby and start giving instruction on how to take shots. All you have to do now is to stand next to the girl, put your arm around her shoulder (optional) and pose for a photograph.
Rejection
This happens, I’ve had girls says “I really don’t like taking photographs coz I look ugly in them” or something along that line. That’s not a straight out rejection, the model just needs some convincing, so say something complimentary like “I think you look great, let’s see how the shot comes out”. Most of the time, they agree.
I’ve also experienced one or two straight rejections. The thing to do is to take it in stride. Perhaps she’s had a bad day, is stressed out or just had an argument with her boyfriend. Don’t take it personally. Smile, thank her, and move on. She might be receptive the next time. Always be polite, and chill out, it happens to the best of us. π
Optional:
If you’re single and unattached and you see a lone diner that’s to your liking, sit down and make conversation. Who knows what it may lead into? You’ve gotta eat anyway, so might as well talk to someone while you’re at it. Make the most of every day, live it like it’s your very last.
Cheers from sixthseal.com and thanks for reading!
Happy Hunting! π