Seven years of

Download: Director’s Cut (with proper music) celebrates its 7th blogniversary today and in remembrance of that, I have made a 10-minute video documenting the progress from Melbourne to KL to Kuching to Sibu and back to KL.

Notable posts of the year:
The Big Mac Chomp Challenge
Tongue Piercing Photos and Video
Hilton Batang Ai Longhouse Resort
Marina Bay Seafood Restaurant
JCI Seduan Wet & Wild Pool Party Guide to Eating Live Sago Worms
The evolution of Chinese names
Zuiho Daiko performance @ Sibu Gateway
My sister’s wedding @ Grand Jasmine Ballroom, RH Hotel
Wrist piercing – sub dermal piercings on my left wrist
CNY in Ipoh
Genting Greed: A Tragic Tale of Losing RM 5,300
Don’t Drift and Drive
Ride of the Valkyries
Hate the sin, love the sinner
Nuffnang Music Bash 2009

It’s been a long journey and I’ll like to thank everyone for reading the chronicles of my life…

…and to show my appreciation, I’m going to buy the first 50 people who comments on this post lunch.

RM 10 each x 50, straight into your bank account via TT. Please ensure that a valid email is provided so I can email you for your account details.

As a bonus (and also to round up the figure to RM 600) I’m going to give the best comment RM 100.

Yes, I’m broke but I’m also feeling generous. :p

Thanks for all your support; I couldn’t have done it without you.

Long live! =D

My belated 28th birthday


I went for lunch with Eiling at The Curve this afternoon – it was supposed to be last week but we were both kinda busy so we postponed it to this week. Eiling told me about this place called Waroeng Penyet which serves authentic Indonesian food so we headed there for our midday sustenance.

penyet interior

You can tell it’s authentic by the teh botol (except this is teh peket) that they serve. My Indonesian friends in Melbourne had this thing about teh botol – literally “bottled tea” – it’s practically an institution in Indonesia.

penyet food

The ayam penyet (their flagship dish – translated as flattened chicken) was awesome as well.

penyet 32

The new answer to life, the universe and everything is not 42…but 32. Economic recession la…10 people retrenched. :p

penyet cig

Yiling passed me some cigarettes by proxy from her recent trip to Perth – these are premium Dunhill tobacco products which I swear I’m not gonna smoke and collect instead. Then again, I’ve said that about a lot of things as well and I always end up smoking/drinking/consuming them anyway. :(

penyet wallet

Eiling gave me the best present ever – a wallet! I have been (not so subtly) hinting about being relieved of my wallet in Bangsar when I was mugged and I’ve never gotten a wallet since then. Eiling kinda picked up the overt hints and got me…

penyet present

…a HIDESIGN natural leather wallet. Awesome! Thanks Eiling! You the best. :)

penyet us

I’m glad I’m fortunate enough to have friends like these. Cheers EZY (Ziling included or she’s gonna say you guys make her look bad again :p).

Thanks for making time for lunch with a commoner instead of the usual Tan Sri, Datuk and Datin company you keep Eiling.

Honored la, I. ;)

One year older, one year wiser?

bday cutting

I turn 28 today. My birthday is on the 5th of April 1981 (it’s always Cheng Beng except for leap years) but I don’t make it a habit of celebrating my birthdays.

bday me

I remember less-than-optimal serotonin levels during my birthday, being in rehab during my birthday, and being so totally messed up that I forgot it was even my birthday! Birthdays are not exactly my favorite day of the year.

bday heli

Anyway, I had an office birthday this year, thanks to SH (less than 3 you, always). She was kind enough to go out of her way to get a cake and a miniature helicopter (to commemorate my helicopter ride) for me. Thanks SH! :)

bday cake

It’s a nice feeling to have people remember your birthday and the people at work set up a diversion and got the conference room ready for the cake cutting ceremony. Thanks to Mimi, Vei Teck and all the others for showing up (and the ones who were there in spirit – thanks Joyce). Cheers! I appreciate the gesture.

You the best SH. I know what you did and I’m touched. My eternal gratitude for the office birthday on Friday. :)

Cheers to Eiling and Yiling who were the first to wish me a happy birthday and the lunch invite next week.

Doris, thanks for the birthday wishes. I’m glad you remembered.

Cynthia, Zoe, Mel, Sze, appreciate the birthday wishes. :)

Cheers Teng Loo for the birthday wishes. You didn’t forget the article that Karen sent us. ;)

Abby, my real estate agent, I suspect you read this blog from your text and I’m surprised you let me rent the place despite all that you know. Thank you for your birthday wishes. :)

bday cherie

Thanks Cherie for the…erm, *cough* birthday gift, the single malt whiskey and the kolo mee all the way from Kuching.

The best birthday wish goes to Arthur, who sent me a text which goes “May you be as handsome as you think, as rich as your friends believe and may you have as many women as everyone suspects! Happy birthday!” LOL! I still can’t stop laughing. Cheers buddy.

To anyone I missed out, my apologies, here is a catchall – thank you everyone for wishing me a happy birthday!

Alright, this “Thank You” post has gone way too long so let’s go through what I did during my birthday. I went to the Nuffnang Music Bash on Saturday, dropped by Cherie’s condo after that to chill, and went to the F1 race in Sepang on Sunday. I just got home and I’m coloring my hair back to black now before heading to bed. My apologies for the disjointed post – I’m sleep deprived and I need to catch up on zzz.

…and finally, thank you all for peppering my Facebook wall with birthday wishes. You made my day. :)

Oh, and if you want to give me a birthday present, I really need a wallet. I suggest – get it delivered to my office. ;)

Happy Birthday Teng Loo, Cup-bearer to the Gods!

ttl birthday

I hardly ever get close to people at work, due to a personal necessity to separate the two identities (work Huai Bin and play Huai Bin), but one of the people I got close to was Teng Loo.

ttl cake

I think of her as my older sister in a way, she’s the same age as my biological sister, and she’s my mentor of sorts. Thus, it is only befitting that I got her a cake for her birthday. :)

tll knife

The cake reads “Happy Birthday Teng Loo, Cup-bearer to the Gods!” coz she’s Aquarius. We share the same affinity for horoscopes. It’s like Lucifer’s sauna at our workplace coz the A/C broke down so we moved to the conference room for the cake cutting ceremony.

ttl blow

I hope you get your birthday wish TTL. You deserve it more than anyone else. You have been a friend, and more importantly, a confidant. You know more about me than anyone else save my parents, and perhaps not even them. :)

ttl cut

Teng Loo’s birthday falls on Valentine’s Day – the 14th of February but Secret Recipe doesn’t do deliveries anywhere close that date so I’m doing an early one for her.

Live long and prosper, TTL. May the best of last year be the worst of this year. :)

Eddy Puah's birthday @ Workshop


Workshop is one of the more private drinking establishments in town
with a regular crowd of patrons. Eddy had his birthday last Saturday night
there with a group of close friends.

condom collection

I had quite a lot of events going on
Saturday so it was a little hectic for me. I went with Faye to Condom Collection late evening to get Eddy a birthday present. It’s the only adult
entertainment shop in Sibu and I wanted to get Eddy something other than
the usual de facto necktie gift.

eddy present

I settled for a pair of edible undies (RM 24.90) and a stress ball made in the shape of a nude female torso (RM 19.90).

edible undies

The Edible Undies is…well, edible and contains the following disclaimer:

edible undies back

Edible Undies is sold as a novelty item only, and has no nutritional value. Garment will dissolve in water or excessive moisture.

stress keychain

Stress Reliever Key Chain is perfect for work related stress. I’m a big fan of stress
balls as well, but I figured popping Xanax would look less conspicuous.
Better living through chemistry…for every problem, a chemical solution!

stress back

It has the tagline: Let go of all your anger, tension and frustration with the STRESS RELIEVER K.C.

eddy gift

Faye told me that wrapping presents
has fallen out of vogue and suggested we put the items in a store
purchased but handmade self sealing paper bag. I agreed since I’m not a
big fan of wrapping stuff myself, so I wrote a birthday message on the
paper bag and we passed it to Eddy.

workshop hub

Workshop is designed to look like a
car workshop. There are neon illuminated wheel hubs on the walls and even
the tables are propped up with hubcaps from discarded tyres.

workshop interior

wine was on free flow courtesy of Eddy and I consumed quite a lot of the
red stuff. I remember belting out a particularly heartfelt rendition of
Creep (Radiohead) after a couple of hours there.

workshop pool

I also
played pool with Faye and as usual, she kicked my ass, not because she’s
better at it (or so I’ll like to think) but because I’m usually more
inebriated than her every time we play.

eddy bday group

Happy birthday Eddy! =D

Alex's birthday at the office

alex birthday 2

This is Alex, our head honcho. It’s his birthday today, so we
pitched in and got a blueberry cheesecake for him with a single candle
(see last year’s post).

alex birthday 2 blowing

In the spirit of Huygens Asia Sdn Bhd humor, he blew out the candle with our weather monitoring station. :)

alex birthday 2 cutting

The cake goes “Happy Birthday Alex” and is adorned with fruits. It’s a chilled and layered cheesecake and it tasted great!

Happy Birthday Alex! 4th Birthday! was officially launched on 19th April 2002. :)

4th birthday celebrates it’s 4th anniversary
today! It’s been up to close to half a decade and still going. There
were several setbacks this year, mostly due to a drug possession case
which severely restricted the nature of my posts so I’m going to do one
last experience report to commemorate the fourth anniversary of the
site (which is a traditionally unlucky number in Chinese culture, and
certainly is an unlucky year for me).

Ecstasy pill name: Red apples
Pill color: Pink with red specks
Circa: KL, Malaysia 2006 (er…I mean 1906, sorry about the date confusion ;))
Suspected contents: MDMA with ketamine (qualitative findings, not reagent tested)
Other substances consumed: Yes. ;)

4th anniversary ecstasy

MDMA and ketamine pill combinations are actually pretty common in
Malaysia. These are nicely pressed pills (hard) with beveled edges and
a solid, high quality imprint of an apple. These are nicely done pills,
not a shoddy home kitchen pill press product.

The subject (male, 60 kg) and a companion (female, 50 kg) swallowed
1 1/2 pills each (crushed up) on an empty stomach and interesting
dissociative effects characteristic of ketamine started to manifest, so
the decision was made to powder the remaining pill and insufflate it.

Subjective characteristics associated with MDMA (empathy, initial
“Ecstasy coming up rush”, blurred vision) started to manifest so the
remainder powdered pill was split into lines and selective sensory
deprivation (scientists refer to it by the technical term “switching
off the lights and turning up the music” ;)) was initiated.

4th anniversary lines

Nystagmus and mild hallucinations started setting in at the peak (T+
0:45) and the lines were insufflated over an unknown period of time
(snorting the powdered pills produced a “speedy” rush with dominating
ketamine qualities e.g. confabulation and time-space disorientation).

4th anniversary cannabis

Cannabis was smoked at about T+ 1:30 and throughout the next few
hours which mellowed out the trip (not an intended effect) but the
visual anomalies and nystagmus and CNS MDMA effects lasted until T+
3:00 before tapering off. Subject’s companion also reported similar
experiences. Other substances consumed:

4th anniversary other substances

Erimin 5 (nimetazepam)
Xanax (alprazolam)

Rating: 6/10
(The “pig” imprinted pills circa December, 2005 from Kuching seems to have a higher MDMA content)

Thank you for allowing me to make one final experience report of a substance consumed in…er, 1906. ;)

Without further adieu, here’s a recap of the troubled history of during the past year:

I got arrested, everyone knows that by now, so I won’t go through any drug or pharmaceutical posts.

Viagra (sildenafil tablets) vs. Cialis (tadalafil tablets) []
A tongue-in-cheek comparison between the two popular ED
(Erectile Dysfunction) pharmaceuticals. Oops…did I just say
“pharmaceuticals”? ;)

Water slide for shit []
A reminder to the kids that opiate dependency is Not Fun (TM).

The bird nesting outside my window []
Before the H5N1 avian flu hit, people were actually rooting for birds! No shit!

Turtle eggs preparation recipe and report []
Before the…oh alright, people have always been rooting for turtles.

I sneezed and my atomic bomb went off []
I still think this is the funniest post title for the last
year. is another corporate time drainer – active in via MapleStory since 2006.

The cough syrup that locals abuse []
In the name of science!!111

PPS Bash 2005 []
The Project Petaling Street Malaysian blogger meetup writeup. Quite a mouthful.

Google AdSense cheque [] was doing good on Google AdSense (trial case
study since the site involves drug and pharmaceutical content) until
too many complaints flooded in (from other bloggers *rolls eyes*) and I
was informed of it by my trial case handler after only the third cheque
was received.

Gone fishin’ [] vs. South China Sea

Mount Kinabalu – The Summit Trail []
Mount Kinabalu summit – Climbing Lows Peak [] vs. Mount Kinabalu

Snorkeling at Manukan Island, Sabah [] vs. The Beach

Laman Web Dajal (Evil website) [] vs. The Establishment
( lost – “vs. The Establishment” is never a good nor fair, fight – I strongly suggest you avoid it ;))

Tongue Piercing – Photos and videos [] goes tongue piercing (again)

Dragons Playing Pearl Fireworks Mines and Shots review with videos [] in “How not to light a cake firework”
(but he does it anyway)

CNY firecrackers and fireworks roundup – a Chap Goh Meh special [] in “Playing with fire”

Jong’s Crocodile Farm report [] vs. Crocodiles.
A tribute to those of you who can identify with crocodile farms, reptilian or mammal. ;)

and the other “Noteworthy Post” in the blog year from 19th April 2005 to 19th April 2006:

I won the Sports Toto 6/42 Jackpot! []
I won the 4D TOTO (Lotto) Jackpot!
…but only got RM 30 (USD 8) out of it.

Read more in the archives [].

Despite everything, has managed to conquer sand, sea
and surf during the past year. We’ll see what challenges the next year
provides. :) has been online for 4 years and counting and it won’t stop until I stop.

The first anniversary of can be viewed here [].

The second anniversary of can be viewed here [].

The third anniversary of can be viewed here [].

A big “Thank You” goes out to all the readers of The support is very much appreciated, as always.

It’s been great, guys! :)

Hail to the King, Baby!

OMG! I actually thought's birthday is on the 16th instead of the 19th of April

I spent the weekend in the arms of opiate withdrawal, shitting
bricks with my nose running to the ground and throwing up every time I
eat anything. It wasn’t pleasant…and reprieve was brought today in
the form of 12 tablets of DF-118 (360 mg of DHC) which I had
intentionally saved up – I’m just buying time Morpheus, I’ll pay you
back tomorrow.

I promise. I don’t need to – you come and make me pay you back
anyway. It’s not like I can run and hide. *shrugswithazasinshrugz”

I had a dream last night. I can only remember bits and pieces of it,
but I remember a dismal landscape, with only a girl there, of my age,
who guided me through it. Except she wasn’t helping me, she was just
providing warmth and company through the journey and I was just getting
more and more lost in the dreamscape. The strangest thing she said to
me when I confronted her about that is that “I am you. You just don’t
know it yet.”

…and OMG! I just used up my opiate allowance for making a birthday post…but it’s not due yet! ZOMG! GOM!111

5th of April, 2006 is my birthday

birthday 2006

I celebrated my birthday yesterday (5th of April, 2006) by sleeping
the whole day. I wasn’t on anything…I was just depressed in general.
I’m 25 this year. I think my birthdays are not meant to be celebrated,
as is the trend as of late, if last year’s birthday [] is of any indication.

birthday box 2006

Louisa sent me a huge box filled with stuff from Sibu and a card
(sent separately) which says “Our lives have taken different paths, but
I still remember the days gone by…I think of you often and reminisce
over the special times we shared. I will treasure those memories, but
time goes on and things do change, the one thing that will never change
is the warm feelings I have for you.”

birthday box blanket 2006

There is a blanket inside for me to use when I’m cold from opiate withdrawals…

birthday box toy 2006

There is a soft toy that sings “Happy Birthday” coz she’s not here to sing it for me…

birthday box others 2006

There is a box of apple juice (for my nutritional use, or for
acidifying my stomach so oral opioids do not work so well, I would
never know ;)), socks (You can never run out of socks. Ever.), a couple
of DVD’s to watch when insomnia hits me and large, black thrash bags
(it’s a bit of an inside joke, I can count the people who gets this
with one hand).

Thanks Louisa! Much love, always and forever…

Thanks to my coworkers Penny and Siaw Chin for buying me a tub of Sunny Hill ice cream for my birthday on the 4th.

Thanks to the multitude of people who sent me SMS birthday wishes!
My apologies for not being able to reply, my cell phone service has
been barred due to a lack of prompt payment.

…and finally, thanks to my parents for never failing to send me a
birthday card every year, for bailing me out of jail and the first
thing that comes out of your mouth is “Did you have access to your
medication during your time in jail?” with a look of pure concern, for
never admonishing me or condescending me with a “I told you so” look
after I was arrested after many years of using drugs, blogging about
drugs, and fucking up in general, and for loving me for who I am.

Happy Birthday Irene Chan Ai Ling! =D

irene 21st

Okay, this is a rather belated post – Irene had her birthday on the
25th of March and I got fucked up that night and also Sunday night so I
didn’t post until today. I was working OT that Saturday (crunch time
for a project) so we just met up for drinks at Luconia.

irene 21st white packet

I got Irene something very cheesy for her birthday. It was funny, at
least with my increasingly demented sense of humor. There were three
things inside, two of them I told her she could probably guess (which
she did, it was plywood ;)) but she didn’t get the third one coz it’s
just too cheesy.

irene 21st trio

This is me, Irene and David. I think we were pretty much fucked up
by that time…at least I was. Hell, I’ve been fucked up since 7 pm. :)

Happy Birthday Irene Chan Ai Ling [] ! Much <3 !

P/S – Aries rulez!!!!1oneone. You’re technically legal now, Irene! =D

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