The Balcony Incident

balcony club

I lost my Sony Ericsson W580i cell phone AND my Sony T2 digital camera on Saturday night at Balcony, Miri. Balcony is a club that opens till late and is very popular with the Mirians. I arrived in Miri at around 8 pm and met up with Kim and Mark at Shiki – the Japanese restaurant for dinner.

island club

We went to Island Club (a pub) after that for drinks and Darren joined us there. I took a total of 111 photos that Saturday but didn’t have time to upload them to my notebook due to excessive social commitments. I had to meet up with some other friends straight after that at Balcony so I went there after Island Club.

ketamine note

SWIM was given a complimentary RM 1 dollar note, folded in a rather peculiar manner as a gift. I was a little taken aback by the RM 1 folded note offering – it’s not everyday someone gives you an RM 1 dollar note. I took the keta…er, I mean currency and opened it up.


The content inside the folded RM 1 note was rather unusual – it consisted of a white powder, which I assumed was sugar. *cough* This photo was taken the next day – I lost my digital camera that very day so it couldn’t have been from the original batch. The original gift had MUCH MORE powdered sugar than from this batch.

balcony urinal

I went to take photos and videos of the Balcony club and decided that a sugar rush would do me some good since I was pretty tired from the drive. I locked myself inside the toilet and partook in the saccharine particles. Perhaps I was a little bit too drunk and I accidentally insufflated (snorted) the entire contents of the sugar inside the toilet instead of consuming it for the sugar energy.

balcony toilet

This was a mistake since I don’t think the stuff was sugar at all. πŸ˜‰ I immediately felt the characteristics of a certain NMDA antagonist come over me the moment the entire batch was snorted. I looked up into the ceiling and saw several layers of ceilings (?) and felt my entire perspective altered. I was looking at the RM 50 dollar rolled up bill that I used to insufflate the powder and thought…Oh, fuck!

balcony stairs

I wanted to call my friend (who were all looking for me – apparently I was inside for the better part of an hour) but I couldn’t manage to move so I was kinda stuck inside the toilet coz I was so fucked up I didn’t even know where I was. I was told the next day that the staff of Balcony unlocked the toilet door and helped me to my feet (and I couldn’t even walk straight even with two people holding me up).

balcony blur

The two staff members went from table to table to ask which group I was with. I think I sat down with an unknown group of people and talked to them (at least to the extent to which you can talk on that particular NMDA antagonist) before my worried friends found me. They took me home and I realized I lost my cell phone AND my digicam. One of my friends went back to search for it but it wasn’t there anymore – I don’t know where I left it.

kj faye

Much thanks to KJ and Faye for taking care of me that night! I lost RM 700 from my wallet and my Public Bank credit card and Faye canceled my cell phone service and credit card that very night in case someone stole it and used it.


I went to the Sony center at Boulevard to get a new digital camera the very next day since I really needed one for blogging. Faye gave me her spare cell phone and her backup SIM card so I still could use a phone. I was meeting up with Kim the next day for lunch so I really needed to replace all the photos that were taken that day. I was undecided about whether to get a Sony T70 or T300 but settled for the former since I seem to have a penchant for losing things when I’m less than sober.

sony shop

It cost me RM 1178 for the T70 plus a 2 GB MS Pro Duo memory card and a Sony leather case. The T300 would have set me back RM 1599 which is not a lot more considering it has a 3.5 inch LCD (versus 3 inch for the T70) and it’s a 10.1 MP digicam (versus the 8.1 T70) but the decision to go for the T70 (besides me always losing things) is that that the 3.5 inch LCD on the T300 makes it hard to put it inside my pants pocket and I want a compact digicam for me to bring around.

sony t70

The worst thing about The Balcony Incident wasn’t the loss of the money, credit card, cell phone or digital camera. It’s the 111 photos INSIDE the digicam that I took earlier during the road trip and in Miri. That cannot be replaced while the others can. Oh well, at least I’ve learnt a lesson – reduce my sugar intake. I’m switching to Pal Sweet. There’s a lot less calories in the latter to boot. πŸ˜‰

Ketamine experience report and video

ketamine 2g baggie

Ketamine is a drug that I’ve used on numerous
occasions but never have really written a trip report about since I
consider it a “regular use” drug. However, I do have various trip
reports (personal) and videos shot while I was snorting or injecting
ketamine and I decided it was high time (no pun intended) to put up the
latest one. πŸ˜‰

I have obtained 2 grams of ketamine crystals earlier this week and decided to go for an introspective k-hole trip
by insufflating the entire packet of ketamine (which cost me RM 450 – k
is not cheap over here). This is the best batch of ketamine (in powder
form) I’ve ever had the pleasure of sampling, though I’ve had access to
liquid pharmaceutical ketamine for IM injections before.

ketamine crystals

The majority of ketamine users insufflate (snort) the crystals
instead of using a syringe to IM the liquid form of ketamine and
despite certain preconceptions, it IS possible to k-hole by
insufflating ketamine crystals of suitable purity if it’s done in
excessive amounts over a very short period of time (Extreme Ketamine

It is not as intense as the K-hole achieved through IM injections
but it is comparable (and it’s all too easy to give yourself a line
dose while injecting ketamine as I once did, which rendered me
effectively anesthetized). The ketamine I obtained this week was
sourced from JB and the purity of the ketamine crystals are one of the
best I’ve seen in Malaysia (and even Australia, to be honest).


Download: Video of me snorting ketamine []

My cell phone went off while I was insufflating ketamine with a RM
50 dollar bill, and I muttered something about it being the perfect
time to call. πŸ˜‰

The ketamine experience:

The ketamine experience can be summed up in one word – confusing. I
personally like to call it konfusing as in “k is konfusing” but it’s a
great experience. Ketamine is an NMDA antagonist, which makes it different from other drugs. PCP (Angel’s Dust) and DXM are two other drugs that belong to this exclusive group of NMDA antagonists.

NMDA antagonists are similar to psychedelic drugs (e.g. LSD, magic
mushrooms) in a sense, though purists would argue with this.
Practically, these are REAL mind-altering drugs with hallucinogenic
potential unlike methamphetamine or heroin which just changes the state
of mind e.g. accelerated thought processes in the former and
comfortable dopamine release in the latter.

It’s more similar to what a non drug user would think “drugs” are – ketamine and the likes are mind-altering drugs instead of mind-state change drugs.
Ketamine, like all NMDA antagonists has “plateaus” which gives
different experiences according to the dosage – a low dosage would give
CNS inebriating effects while a large dose will give full blown
hallucinations and profound out of body experiences.

ketamine snort

The amount of ketamine I snorted (2 grams of relatively pure
ketamine crystals) was sufficient to bring me into a k-hole, a term
ketamine users use to describe an intense trip characteristic of
ketamine. It’s an amazing mind altering experience where sense of time,
temporal space, and all other “reality grips” are TOTALLY lost.

Ketamine Trip Report:

One recurring “trip theme” I have when I take large doses on ketamine is existentialism or more accurately, human consciousness.
I insufflated about 2 grams of ketamine and I found myself in a
profoundly altered state – everything slows down and familiar shapes
become unfamiliar. I could not talk or move much – I tried standing up,
and promptly sat down again.

The thought processes goes into a completely unfamiliar loop which
can be frightening for first time ketamine users (or those who haven’t
experienced a k-hole). The vision starts to become tunnel-like, walls
and other textures flows and occasionally RGB colors gets infused into
the wall. Closed eye hallucinations are extremely strong and hard to
ignore, as is open eye hallucinations at this point.

I felt like a long, long time has past and I started thinking about
the meaning of life, and one recurring theme is that someone (a divine
being) starts to reveal the secrets of the universe to me – that
“reality”, as we know it, DOES NOT EXIST and even I
(as a person, and my consciousness) does not exist and ketamine is the
substance that “broke me free” from the illusion of “reality” (or life)
as we know it.

I start to see the world as it really was – that we’re just an
insignificant part of a larger life form (divine being?) e.g. I am just
one of the stomach elements in a large being and my job is just to push
the food as it comes through to the next “person” (which is the next
stomach segment) and that’s all I do (reflecting the world’s monotonous
work life).

I can aspire to “break free” of my current “existence” while I’m
tripping on ketamine (always in the same ketamine trip theme) by sheer
force of will. I can go through a scary, hair-raising “transformation”
into one of the Superior Beings (where existence as we know it is only a part of their bodily function) and become a deity, a God, if you will.

The scariest part about this “transformation” (and I always opt to
do it) is that I will have to die in this life in order to make the
leap to become a Superior Being. I start thinking (vaguely) about my
life, my loved ones, and overcome the feelings of fear of death
(I would have no qualms taking my own life at this point, and I
frequently think about doing that if it can expedite my transformation
into the “real world” if I end my life in our current reality

…and there is always a repetitive ringing, reverberating sound as
I make my “transformation” to break free from “reality” as we know it
and I start to become one deity in a great chain of deities and my
transformation will continue for all eternity by aspiring to become a
Greater Deity (either by going through a scary out of body, death-like
extreme ketamine trip) or some other greater methods in that spiritual

There’s a vivid sense of “spiralling” into this new world and I do
not “exist” in this realm, as in I do NOT have a physical body, but my
consciousness is there, and everything that exists in this realm i.e.
“the real world” is just spritual beings and I am one of them and I can
communicate with the others, not through words, but some form of
telepathy. I have a “world” that’s mine, a space where only I exist and
I can see the other lower “worlds” (or realms) and even the higher ones.

I usually can just see the next higher realm above me in great
detail (the even higher realms after that are fuzzy) and that’s where I
will travel. I am able to occasionally “float up” from my current realm
and look from a God-like perspective into the other realms. I glimpse
through the “worlds” (it’s all in a long, long chain) and I see that
the “realm chain” is eternal – it’s infinate.

It’s a long way to go after “breaking free” in this world and
joining the enlightened spiritual realm and the neverending trip to
work my way up to become greater and greater deities and I am exposed
to great vistas and wonders that are never available in this world
though hallucinations (the hallucinations on ketamine are vivid, you
actually experience it in every sense – tactile, sound, sight) in each
transformation I go through in the process to reach Nirvana.

It’s a long journey, and it’s a scary one, but I do it every time.

…and then the trip ends. Ketamine lasts 1-2 hours in the intense
k-hole trip and then tapers off to sobriety at about the 4 hour point.

It’s a great drug. I love ketamine – every trip is always
enlightening. It’s very intense and can be scary during the k-hole, but
if you overcome your fear of death, it will be a great teacher to you.

Mini Binge Draft: v.beta

<p>This is a post by <a href=””>veritas</a>.</p>

<p>I wote this while still very under the influence and try as I want
to, I cannot simply provide resoanably understandable phrases while in
this mindstate. Plus, I took a heavy dose of benzodiazepines and theire
siren calls are irresistible, try as hard as I could. That was
originally the plan – I hae tweaked for a few days so today ios the
time to stop…except I ended up having classic ideas like taking LSD
(acid) at 5am the morning. Hehe! If I knoew I wasn’t gonnabe this
tired, I’ll have been out. So here’s the very dubious draft, read at
your own risk, sinlight just looks so beautiful on a low 1 blotter dose
of acid. I amazed that that all the insufflated meth couldn’t keep me
from sleeping. The acid too, visuals look great in the daytime , it’s a
small dose, but its great. I’ll tell you more tomorrow, Too sleepy not
to saything except food. And fractals. Anyway, I’m stopping here and
I’ll post a photo up so it isn’t all tes.t I can’t think coherently
now, but check back tomorrow and I’ll have posted a nether post with
all the pirctures and when I’m sober enough to write. Bye nite…and you
can have a read at the really rough draft starting here:</p>

<p><img alt=”msysleep.jpg” src=”” border=”0″ height=”263″ width=”350″><br>
Intrigues by this picture? Have you been subject to sleepless nights
because you wonder what that picture is. Well , check ack tomorrow and
all will be clear! I did take a lot of pics of substances b ut nah
can’t postm them today toooosleepy. I had something to say but I forgot
it again like usual. Fuck.</p>

<h3>Idiot warning: Please refrain from reading because there’s an idiot writubg (though not intentionally.</h3>
<h2>Final warning: Drug retard’s journal. Not recommended for reasing</h2>
Oh man, even typing that out made me have to think for a long to to get
that thought out. I should probably put a caution here: This post will
endoubtadly lead in an appropriate degress of respect, but in my
defence, some stuff have been sitting in the drawer for AGES and I
never had an urge to touch them (except for dex/meth). I don’t know why
I’m at the first paragraph again, will go down and find the one I
posted in last and I’m going to put an idiot waitning on top.
<p><b>Substances: </b><br>
Day 1 – Day 6<br>
Methamphetamine <br>
Dextroamphetamine (Dexamphetamine, Dexedrine)<br>
Day 3 or 4 or 5  <br>

<p>Ketamine = early this morning (or was it last night?) time just loses it’s meaning when you stay up a while.<br>
Bendodiazepines (clonazepam, diazepam)<br>
Salvia Divinorum (Diviner’s Sage)<br>
Cannabis (marijuana)<br>
95% alcohol…I think that’s what made me so drowsy wit the benzo doses I just look. I’m having a bizzzare feeling now./<br>
Mushrooms! =D</p>

<p><b>Caution: </b> This post might be offensive to three different people<br>1.
Who have been brainwashed by government propaganda into thinking “Drugs
are bad mmmkay?” The scond group that might be displeased is the harm
reduction organizations, who’s work and time towards the cause have
always been appreciated! To them I say, my apologies for contributing
to the image of irresponsible use. To the first group I say, get your
fucking ass out of your head because eat food – shit comes out – eat
shit ad nauseum is not a healthy way to life. I’ll also like to mention
that I’m not the most responsible drug user out there, so please do not
take my comments as representative of a larger group. If you do, I
suggest that a refresher course in university might do you a world of
good to keep things in perspective.<br>
<b>Background:</b> Taking methamphetamine/dextroamphetamine for 6 days
straight. Today is the sixth day. I wanted to comedown yesterday but
thatfunny ketamine kept me awake and so here I an,I would love tell you
about the..tius is like a really bad movie but I seriously forgot again.<br>
<b>Substances: </b></p>

<p>It’s the end of the semester some more!!!!! I felt so tired after my
5 day run without food and sleep (got some on the sixth night, yum
drowisnes alernt, oh and I’m going to pass out right now I’m so sleepy!</p>

<p><b>Anyway substances taken:</b> methamphetamine (meth) <b>I’LL STOP
that’s giving up, I will resist the URGE to sleep and I promise I’ll
get this done pictures and all (although shoddiness is garunteed) </b>now iE TONIET., dextroamphetamine (Dexidrine instant release), diazepam (Valium),</p>

Note: er…somehow this post didn’t survive the server move, but the final post did</p>

Pill report: White ? (Question Mark)

Disclaimer: veritas
[mailto:] is a guest author and is not related to
the owner of the domain. The following report deals with
substances which may be illegal in your country.

White Question Mark

Pill Logo: ?
Pill Color: White with dirty specks
Area: Melbourne
Date: February 2003
Other: The other side has a single score, the ? imprint is uneven and the pill has beveled edges.
Suspected contents: Ketamine

Scanned picture of the white Question Mark

This pill is going for A$20 instead of the usual A$35. That’s nearly
half the price of a normal pill. I didn’t expect it to be MDMA, but
since it was going for such a bargain price, I picked up two of these.
The pill has a ? logo on one side (not imprinted well) and a single
score on the other side. The pill also has beveled edges and has a hard
press. The pill is very thick too, thicker than usual pills.

Isometric view – pill is thick

I ate one and crushed the other one in an envelope. The pill isn’t
crumbly and I had to run a dog tag over the crushed pill several times
before it reached an acceptable consistency. I divided up the pill into
two lines and tried to rail it, but it was just too much powder for me
to snort comfortably in one go.

Size comparison with A$2 coin

It burns fairly badly while going up too. I’m not sure if that’s coz
of the cuts or because I didn’t crush the pill up well enough. I just
chucked it into an envelope and banged it about a bit and then ran a
dog tag over it to smoothen over the larger chunks. I did bumps over
the course of the night and it got me fairly high, but I didn’t K-hole.
The effects were felt in a couple of minutes.

The crushed pill

Anyway, I felt very significant nausea when insufflating the powder.
There was a strong psychological aversion to snorting more too, due to
the extreme nausea it causes. It made me retch several times, but after
a while it didn’t matter. Subjective effects seem to indicate ketamine.
I felt numb and dissociated and it didn’t last very long. At the peak,
I was feeling very drunk and it’s quite euphoric. It damn near put me
to sleep too, but I chugged a bottle of diet coke and was fine after
that. I was starting to return to baseline by the 2 hour mark.

It seems to be a nice ketamine pill, but I don’t have tolerance so I
can’t speak for the strength. I wished I insufflated the first pill
instead of eating it though. Personally, I think it’s a good ketamine
pill for A$20 but it’s definitely not MDMA so avoid if you’re shopping
for Ecstasy.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...