Happy Boom – exploding packets!

happy boom

Happy Boom. Do you remember the packets that you squeeze and it
explodes when you throw it away? I finally found them! I’ve been
looking for this for ages, I’ve only seen it during my primary school
days and now I’ve found it at a grocery shop in Tabuan Jaya. Basically,
what you do is give these packets a bit of a squeeze, throw it away,
and it expands and explodes.

happy boom front

The Happy Boom packs go for RM 0.40 each. I got a couple to play
with. I had to take the photos in the egg containers in the shop coz
the lighting goes better this way.

happy boom back

This is the back of the package. It contains Sodium Bicarbonate and
Citric Acid Monohydrate. I prepped my digicam, gave it a bit of a
squeeze and got ready to take pictures.

happy boom expand

This is the Happy Boom expanding. Once you squeeze the packet,
friction combines the two components (shown later) together and it
starts to expand. It will explode soon after that, leaving no visible
remnant.

happy boom explode

We were too close the first time and when it exploded, it got three
of us, except Ah Boon. The discharge was not unpleasant, just a quick
wipe and everything’s fine. It got on the digicam lenses too, but I
keep camera wipes in there (amongst other things *cough*) so that’s no
problem.

happy boom contents

The back of the packaging says “Peket ini tidak boleh dibuka” (This
packet cannot be opened) which basically has the effect of telling me
to open the packet, and so I opened one up to see what’s inside. This
is what it contains – a small packet of sealed liquid, which I presume
is the citric acid and some powder, which I presume is sodium
bicarbonate.

happy boom break

I broke open the liquid pack, and the liquid seems cool, it’s no
industrial grade acid, obviously, so don’t worry about it. One of my
friends mixed the powder into the water while I snapped a photo:

happy boom froth

This is what the reaction would be outside an enclosed package – it
just bubbles and froths. I imagine Happy Boom works by making the
package expand with the gases made by the reaction between the two
chemicals to the stress limit, which makes it explode.

Thus, I’ve compiled the events of last night. Miriam and Ah Ann came
over. We watched Ju On (the first one) for a while. I generously
self-medicated with benzodiazepines, alcohol and *cough*. We went out
to meet Ah Boon. Then this Happy Boom experiment happened. After that,
we went to eat. I overestimated my stomach capacity and ended up
throwing up. Whoa, like, everything is clear now. πŸ˜‰ All hail digicams
for memory retrieval!

Japanese Pizza!

ichiban teppanyaki

There is this wonderful Japanese Pizza available at either I-Chi-Ban
Teppanyaki or Economy Tepanyaki (depending on which sign you look at)
at Tabuan Jaya. I had this last night as well, and this eating
establishment scene preceded the teh c peng post chronologically.

chef jap pizza

This is the proprietor preparing my Japanese Pizza. Watch him shape the pizza into, er…a pizza.

japanese pizza

Now this, my friends, is the Japanese Pizza. It looks and tastes
wonderful. Those brown flaky things on top are cuttlefish! There is a
layer of pork floss between the topping and the pancake. Lovely! The
sauce is a mayonnaise – Thousand Island fusion topping, which goes
really well with the ingredients. There are some brown onion skins
which adds to the taste too.

japanese pizza closeup

Here’s a closer look at the pancake. This is the interior, which
shows raw onions, meat and some other stuff. It’s not authentic
Japanese cruisine, obviously, but this goes for RM 4, and the portion
is generous, which is a great bargain!

boon taiwan sausage

Ah Boon had a plate of chicken chop and this Taiwan sausage (shown
above) which I had as well. Ah Ann had some rice with beef and onions
and Miriam had the Japanese Pizza as well.

I will rewind the events of last night to the last post (which is
chronologically the second post after the initial post) in this series
which lead to me throwing up in the middle of the night in a dirty
longkang in Tabuan Jaya.

Three layer teh c peng

three layer teh c peng

The photo above shows a beautifully made Teh C Peng with three
visible layers in the mug. Look at the pretty layers! I’ve never seen
anything like this before. This was taken at an eating establishment
somewhere in Tabuan Jaya before the throwing up incident. I remember
the four of us (Ah Boon joined us) sitting there and generally making a
ruckus. We had food too but I drank 5 or 6 cups of these wonderful
things. It was just too beautiful to resist. Three layers – the bottom
one is sugar water (dense), the middle one is evaporated milk, and the
top layer is the tea (least dense). Stir it up and it makes very pretty
colors…and it finally settles into the rich, creamy brown of teh c
peng.

I remember us making orders in an unacceptably loud volume and
inserting classics like “Mesti mahu kau, if not super kau, we won’t pay
for it”.

I will reconstruct the rest of the night prior to this based on my
digicam photo time dating. I think there was a collective sigh of
relief when we left. Oh, and 2 mg of clonazepam to a completely
non-benzodiazepine tolerant person produced exceedingly powerful
disinhibition, similar but stronger to that of alcohol (based on my
knowledge of that person’s experience with alcohol), and the shredding
of proper “social behavior”. It is an interesting observation that I
made, will keep that in my notes.

P/S – The abovementioned person took clonazepam on his own free will.

What the fuck happened last night?

ah ann mariam home

I remember Miriam telling me she was going to drop by and then Ah
Ann called and said he was coming. That is my spartan dig…I sleep on
a mattress in the living room (even though I have a double bed frame
and two sleeping rooms). I have only one chair so I always tell people
to just sit on my bed.

mariam home

This is Miriam. Photos are all blurry due to a lack of sobriety. I
am only sober during office hours, my apologies. I know we went out
after this.

Fast forward to six hours past this point.

tabuan throw up

I regurgitate in some drain in Tabuan Jaya.

Let me recollect my thoughts and reconstruct the missing scenes in between.

tabuan shennanigens

I think there were some food related shenanigans since that’s what my digicam shows, so we’ll work from there…

Warning! That bottle of Absolut Vodka is not what it seems!

1l df absolut

It looks like a normal bottle of Absolut Vodka on the first glance. These are the 1 liter bottles, not the 750 ml ones.

1l df find

Further inspection didn’t reveal anything dubious about this bottle of vodka too. Imported by Maxximum Malaysia Sdn. Bhd.

1l df found

“It’s got to be here somewhere”, I thought and scrutinized the
bottle. Here it is! The “Malaysian Duty Not Paid” stamp. I was told
that there are multiple routes for the…ah, diverted liquor industry,
with some coming in from Labuan, some coming in from Langkawi and some
even from Singapore (!?!?). Labuan and Langkawi are duty free havens
with RM 1 dollar cans of beer (A$ 0.35 cents) and bottles of branded
distilled spirits for RM 30 (A$ 10). By the time it gets to the “duty
free liquor specialists” in Kuching, the price is sold to the consumer
at RM 55 for this bottle of 1 litre Absolut vodka. This is undercutting
legitimate outlets by RM 20 – RM 40 and up market drinking
establishments by up to RM 150. There are discounts for bulk purchases,
6 bottles of these will lower the cost to RM 50 per bottle. Bottles up
to the duty free liquor industry! Ah, I meant bottoms up. πŸ˜‰

P/S – My digicam CF Card reader seems to be broken so I had to go
out and get an Apacer 8 in 1 card reader to get the photos in. Two
girls sitting at a coffeeshop gave me wolf whistles both times I passed
them. πŸ™ Now I know how females feel when they get sexually harrassed
like that. I feel violated. I feel dirty and scared. I want to go home
and take a long hot shower and curl up in a ball under my blankets…

Nah, actually I enjoyed the attention. πŸ˜‰

Old men in coffeeshop

old men talking

I was having breakfast early this morning at an old style Chinese
coffee shop in Padungan when I noticed the next table had a group of
senior citizens reminiscing about the Kuching of yesteryear. My
coworkers told me that they’re regulars in this coffee shop, and it’s
interesting to watch them just sit there every morning, read the
papers, talk (in fluent English) about how Kuching was in the past and
drink their hot coffees. There is a certain sort of charm in this
scene. I like this photo.

Dinner and a movie (with Ah Kuas and some Ecstasy pills thrown in)

star kuching

Miriam wanted to do this horror movie marathon by watching all the
currently showing flicks …so Saturday night, Ah Lung (Miriam’s bf)
dropped by my place to pick me up since there’s an established
association between Saturday nights and me ending up incapable of
operating a motor vehicle safely, and my vehicular accident history
does not inspire faith in the others so I don’t have to drive. Heh.

tiger beer classic

We then picked up Ah Boon and he had come with offerings. There
seems to be this beer called “Tiger Special Classic” out on the markets
now. It didn’t to taste any different from the normal Tiger beer and
evoked (not entirely unwanted) memories of Cap Langkau. Anyway, we
headed to Star Cineplex after that to go get the tickets. There two
that she hasn’t watched – Ju On 2 and Dead End. I haven’t watched any
of them. We finally settled for the latter and went to get some supper.

sin kwang heng

This is supper at the Central Market, Kuching. The stall’s name is
Sin Kwang Heng and they’ve been serving soya bean and sio bi’s for as
long as I can remember.

blmm supper

The four of us had that and went back to Star to catch Dead End.

dead end movie
Photo taken in cimema.

The movie was alright, there’s a lot of that sudden creepy music
leading to a Horrible Thing (TM) scenes that has become a staple of
horror movies. There was on particularly disconcerting one with the
mother seeming to scratch an itch that wouldn’t go away, and she kept
on going at it, and the camera pans right and we see that she’s
scratching her brain, the skull fragment has fallen off to expose the
brain.

I think that the movie counts too much on the “sudden shock” horror
movie cliche though I think they managed it well, since I could feel
the people behind me recoiling in fright. The funniest exchange of the
day:
(sudden horror scene)

Ah Boon: Mai cibai hak tiok wah.
(Your mother’s cunt, scared me.)

Ah Lung: Wo mah se ho e hak tiok.
(The scene caught me by surprise too.)

Me: Wa chiak aneh chey Xanax, e pun etan hak tiok wah!
(I’ve taken so many Xanax pills and it still managed to give me a start!)

Miriam: Wo mei yo pei siak tau wor?
(I didn’t think that scene was all that scary.)

We look at her. Horror movie veteran.

Anyway, after the movie, we received word that raids are still in
full force (sigh). Tropicana (?) or another disco/entertainment venue
was raided earlier during the night. We drove around to await further
news and went hunting for Ah Kua’s for my digital photography
collection. Here’s one of them:

ah kua

Unfortunately, they managed to obscure their faces before I took the
photo. The flash is terribly slow and my digicam is the Nikon 5700,
which no one in their right mind would call low profile, so I didn’t
get many good ones, the camera can be spotted a mile away. I’ll only be
publishing this one anyway. This does not mean that we’re against
transsexuals or anything as malignant as that. It’s just street
photography, a hobby of mine. πŸ™‚

Anyway, true to the basics of economics, word started filtering in
that dealers are trying to offload as much of their stock as they can,
since word about raids get around and there’s be no one in left the
outlets except the exclusively alcohol representation. It would be
logical to assume that hoarding the pills for next week due to Acts of
Law Enforcement would be the sane thing to do, but strangely, the
Kuching market subscribes to an alternate line of thought and goes for
a more aggressive approach – they offload it by undercutting “normal
street prices” which is usually reported as RM 35 outside a venue and
anywhere from RM 40 upwards inside.

x pills 3 pack

These were going for RM 30 each or RM 80 for 3 pills, going as cheap
as RM 1,750 for 100 tablets bulk. A friend of ours bought the 3 pack
(he’ll be the only one dropping) and wanted to reagent test it at my
place, which I didn’t mind at all, so long as there’s relevant data to
publish about the Ecstasy pills going around Kuching now.

Disclaimer: I did not consume the pills nor do I have
anything illegal in my possession. I quit all illicits remember? All
three pills were consumed by a mutual friend who shall remain unnamed,
but we’ll call him SWIM for consistency in publication. I did not know
that person before today and I don’t have any of his contacts either.
He just wanted me to reagent test them to see what substance it
contains and said he’ll tell me what it felt like, called him just now
and this is what he has to say:

(All text below is by SWIM, but sixthseal.com has full copyright and
intellectual property ownership claims granted by SWIM in return for
reagent testing the Ecstasy tablets. All photographs are taken by me.)

X (XXX, Xtreme Games) Ecstasy pill report

Pill name: X, XXX, Xtreme Games
Pill color: Beige/dark yellow, almost mustardy.
Circa: Kuching, Sarawak (February 2004)
Details: There’s a large X stamp covering the side of one pill
and a smaller x inside the large one. There is no score and the back is
poorly pressed. The pill was quite soggy and had a white inner layer.
The pills seems to be originally white and then dipped into coloring.
Pill contents: MDMA

I, bearer of good news, stand witness that there’s more real Ecstasy
(MDMA) in the market now. This may be due to a more sophisticated
clientele, or to the relatively short acting properties of this
compound, compared to methamphetamine, which makes MDMA ideal for a
night out. I was quite pleased and surprised when the Marquis result
went purple/black:

yellow x marquis

And the Mandelin reagent produced a shade of purple as well:

yellow x mandelin

I triple dropped this (crunched up and swallowed all three Ecstasy
pills at the same time). Obviously I’m not very big on ascertaining the
MDMA content of each pill beforehand. Needless to say, this is not in
the interests of harm reduction since there might be more possible
medical complications. I’ve has always been a loud proponent of
multiple pill consumption, which seems to be a concept which is foreign
in Kuching. People seem to go really slow here, one or half a pill and
maybe the other half later.

yellow x pill front
Front of the pill with the X imprint.

Wtf? I’ve never seen the point in dropping a single pill, except for
review purposes. I typically quad drop (for weaker pills) and triple
drop (for stronger ones), since our group of friends are in different
lines of work so it’s only Saturday nights. Go hard or go home. πŸ˜‰ I
heard these ones are strong, so I triple dropped after testing for
active compounds with the reagents. I feel safe and I’m not worried
about MDMA, since I’ve had quite a bit of experience with it, so I
didn’t mind consuming an potential atypically strong batch since I’ve
been on higher doses (560 mg MDMA lab tested).

T+ 0.15 The typical indicators that an MDMA psychedelic trip is next on your itinerary.

T+ 0:30 I have to credit the local pills for being able to hold it’s own in terms of quality.

T+ 0.40 Sudden peak, body high, sensory enhancement and strong feelings of empathy and bonding typical of MDMA noted.

T+ 1:00 Very nice! I haven’t been this happy in a long time! πŸ™‚ I must have let my serotonin stores fill up nicely.

T+ 1:10 Jaw chattering, teeth clenching and feelings of alternating
extreme cold and extreme heat manifested. The body temperature
regulation issue resolved itself soon, but Miriam noticed that I had
unnaturally dilated pupils and the others could see I was peaking hard.

T+ 1:30 Totally out of it, Speech was rendered near impossible due
to heavy slurring and I found it hard to communicate due to the
inability to remember words and construct proper sentences. My friends
could tell that I was much blurer (than usual anyway ;)). I could
maintain some semblance of sobriety if the situation warrants it,
thought it probably won’t fool anyone in a drug raid.

Events after this point are only vague half forgotten memories, just
remember a wonderful flood of serotonin which I haven’t experienced in
a while. There was extreme nysagamus which adds to the beauty of MDMA.
I’m not a big fan of pills, to be honest, I’m more of a meth fan, since
MDMA usually precedes the dreaded E-pression. Three of these (no
tolerance, last pill was 1-2 months ago) did give me a wonderful MDMA
experience. I thought I couldn’t get the same effects from MDMA anymore
but I was proved wrong. It was beautiful…

yellow x pill back
Back of the Yellow X pill – not very well pressed.

RTB around 5 hour mark. Sleep doesn’t seem to be forthcoming even at
T+ 11:00 despite generous benzodiazepine administration. The comedown
is a bit harsh too, to say the least. The depression storm is
definitely building up and it seems like a big one this time. With one
hand, He giveth and with the other, taketh away. πŸ˜‰ Nevertheless, I
give it a much deserved:

Rating: 9/10

Splatterday Night Fever:
splatterday 290204
29th February 2004

A least complimentary photo of yourself every Sunday. Come as you
are. Scattered Sundays (TM) is a designation day of rest according to
the gospel. Here at sixthseal.com, we like to think of ourselves as
Christians and thus is bound by the teachings of the Bible. The Lord
hath speaketh! In deference to this religious observation, comments
will only be replied on Monday. πŸ˜‰

In other news, I’m planning to go for a full renal test this week.
I’ll love to see the results. My girlfriend always admonishes me with a
“hen tuo when ti” when I say something like this. πŸ™‚ I admit, I’m a bit
of a hypochondriac, but I want to go anyway, if just to see the
results. Which medical center would be cheaper? Normah or Timberland?
I’ll wager RM 50 that someone is bound to say, “Renal function test? At
your age?” πŸ˜‰ I’ll love to reply with something like “Yeah, I wanted to
see if 8 years of recreational drug use did any damage to my kidneys.”,
but obviously, a smartass reply should be avoided since our fine
country Malaysia does not offer full doctor patient confidentiality.
It’s definitely a far cry from medical professionals in Australia who
treats the patients (had several drug induced ER trips) and releases
them after lightly treading the issue about whether the patient wants
to talk to the inhouse drug dependency counselor (it’s optional), with
no obligation to report to the police. Hell, they even give you your
stuff back…

Newsflash: Another clinic hit by notorious doctor shopper veritas

Sarawak, MY. 29th February 2004. Leaping into the new leap year, the
city of Kuching today saw another clinic issuing a permanent script for
benzodiazepines to veritas, a seasoned doctor shopper who has managed
to obtain multiple legitimate scripts for restricted items as diverse
as dexamphetamine (which is the dextro isomer of the potent stimulant
amphetamine) to various benzodiazepines, including flunitrazepam
(Rohypnol, the so called “date rape drug”) at the same time in the past.

drk front

He has emigrated to the city of Kuching and successfully procured 2
mg of clonazepam (better known as Rivotril or Klonopin) and 10 mg of
diazepam (the chemical name for Valium), infinitely renewable every two
weeks in his latest exploit, which he called “Doctor Shopping Kuching
Edition Issue #5”. The dazed doctor was left saying vaguely “Someone
came in and said he has social phobia, is new to Kuching, has been on
benzos for years and told me what he was prescribed.”

“I don’t really know what happened after that. I think I tried to
change his script to antidepressants but he knew all about SSRIs, NARIs
and tricyclics, taking the words out of my mouth before I’ve even
formed them. He even knew about Buspar and said it made him feel even
worse before I wanted to suggest it. Before I knew it, I found myself
docilely writing out what he wanted and asked him to come back every
two weeks. I even asked him if he wanted an extra 2 mg of clonazepam! I
can’t remember what happened, just wisps of memories, but I know he
somehow convinced me to write a permascript for him…very persuasive
but polite young man though”, he added.

drk back

We asked medical professionals about their opinion in this new
development. One doctor, who only wanted to be known as Dr. Lah (names
changed to protect the innocent) said “I hate that motherfucker! He’s
undermining the credibility of medical professionals like us and
flaunting his exploits on the Internet! I found several blister packs
of Dormicum missing during my stock take…I bet he’s the one who
bribed…er, nevermind.”, and fell silent. When asked whether he knew
that veritas’s sister is also a doctor practicing in Christchurch, New
Zealand, he immediately asked “Really? How old is she? Pretty or not?”,
while the 70 year old, small statured man worked on discreetly removing
his wedding ring.

One doctor, on the condition of anonymity, was quoted as saying “I
don’t really mind at all. I’ll like to welcome veritas and all the
people like him to my friendly clinic. You know lah, nowadays in
Kuching, you throw one stone, you’re bound to hit two doctors on the
head. Hard to make ends meet you know! I rather eng eng and just take
in clients, I mean, patients like veritas, in and out, script
him and off he goes. I don’t care for those people with real ailments.
I mean yuck…plus there’re not loyal some more. Only come when they’re
sick. Hmph! How can generate consistent revenue stream like that? I
like people like veritas who comes in every two weeks for a guaranteed
income, er…I mean, to help him with his condition. I’ll like to take
this opportunity to tell everyone that yes, there are understanding
doctors out there! Call me ya!”

drk diazepam
Generic APO 10 mg diazepam

Another doctor added “I’ll like to see him try that shit with me,
I’ll hoot him upside down, then he know!” The doctor later requested
that his name not be published.

We also interviewed some passerby’s for their opinion regarding this
issue. The first one, Hee Poh Krit vehemently denounced veritas’s
actions, saying that his shenanigans makes it harder for “legitimate
people suffering from anxiety to get benzodiazepines”. He refused to
comment further when asked whether he’s on benzodiazepine therapy, only
saying, “I take these things strictly according to the doctor’s
instructions coz I would feel bad otherwise”, in a high and mighty,
self righteous tone before hurrying away.

The next civilian, called Koh Pee Kat also condemned the activities,
though he ended his statement by saying, “Er…actually, I only know
that there’s a cheaper alternative to 5 zai (the local slang for black
market Erimin 5, a tablet containing the benzodiazepine nimetazepam)
after reading sixthseal.com and castitas.com. I dunno a benzo from a
banzai before being enlightened and I now use his techniques to doctor
shop. I don’t want to give him credit coz he’s my competition now. Even
though you can say he’s my guru.”, he added, hanging his head.

drk roche 2
Roche brand name 2 mg Rivotril tablets.

Another bystander, when asked for his opinion, merely said “Har? Lu kong hamik? Wa beh hiaw tiah ang moh.”

We finally managed to get hold of veritas and he only had this to
say: “Eh, help me keep track of my perma scripts okay? Dr Y (C) for 2
mg clonazepam and 2 mg lorazepam daily, refill every Saturday, Dr N (S)
for 30 mg phenobarbital and 10 mg diazepam daily, refills every other
Sunday and Dr K (K) for 2 mg clonazepam and 10 mg diazepam daily, go
for refills every alternate Saturday. Got it? Oh, and if I forget,
remind me first letter is the name of the doctor and second letter is
for the area. Thanks! Appreciate your help!”

When asked whether he knew that possessing multiple scripts is
illegal, he literally disappeared, leaving nothing but a person bearing
a remarkable resemblance to him who insists he’s not veritas but “Huai
Bin” and when asked about veritas, said “Who the hell is he and why
should we care for him?” before making a quick exit.

We do not know where or when the elusive veritas will resurface again, but we can be sure of one thing – he will strike again.

– sixthseal.com news

First paycheck in second job

rm 1820

This is the obligatory and somewhat masturbatory post to commemorate
my first paycheck in my second job – RM 1,820. πŸ™‚ I’m a System Engineer
and I do mostly stuff related to networking (no, I’m not a network
admin) and programming. Basically, what I do is related to distributed
network systems, I can’t say much more than that really, it would
reveal which company I’m working for since there are not many players
in this line of work.

I get to play around with all sorts of lovely electronics and
basically develop solutions for enterprise level clients (which the CTO
reviews before deployment), though the company is pushing into the
lucrative small business and other associated markets. My apologies for
being vague, I really can’t say what industry I’m in since there’s not
many companies doing this and I want to preserve my anonymity in
Kuching.

Anyway, about my salary, I get RM 2,000 per month (base salary) – RM
180 goes to EPF (KWSP) so that’s RM 1,820 take home. My employer
contributes RM 240 using the 9/12 EPF formula so that’s RM 420
automatic savings per month. I love EPF, didn’t have it in my first
job. I work a six day week (half day on Saturday) but that just means
there’s one less day to waste money. That also means I make full use of
Saturday nights to Party Hearty (TM). =D

Oh wait, I can’t TM that, it was already in Simpsons. “Sorry dudes, party hearty equals tardy.” πŸ˜‰

Arrack Putih Cap Langkau

cap langkau
Would you like some methanol in your liquor sir?

Hello there, you’re reading sixthseal.com – the weblog where we go
to great lengths to provide quality reviews about stuff that you might
not want to try. Today, we will be focusing on Arrack Putih Cap Langkau
– the ghetto liquor brewed in Sibu, Sarawak. Buatan Malaysia, ini! Very
local too.

arrack putih langkau

We used to call this Chap Langjiaw for reasons which would be
obvious if you tasted this fine product of my home state. It retails
for the low, low price of RM 5 for 570 ml of about 30% alcohol. I said
about because the distillery does not know exactly what proof the
alcohol content is at, so it just put +- beside that sign. We do not
have those newfangled thingies to measure alcohol content in Sibu, you
see.

cap langkau tiger

Back to where Chap Langkau got its nickname, look at the fine
quality of the product. No, that is not an optical illusion, you saw it
right. The liquor is made and poured into empty Tiger beer bottles!
That’s how ghetto Cap Langkau is. Sharikat Peng Guang Pengarakan Sdn
Bhd is very big on recycling and they take environmental issues seriously and reuse what they can.

cap langkau cup

I’ve seen it come in various beer bottles, but the similar thing
about it is, it always has the Cap Langkau label slapped on the front,
the distillery’s bottle cap and a free cup covering the top. I shit you
not, I did not put that cup on top of the bottle, all Chap Langkau
liquor bottles comes with one complimentary plastic cup (the colors may
vary, but the size is similar). This is to show that the company cares
about its clientele and like sixthseal.com, their aim is to please. πŸ˜‰

langkau bottle cap

Basically, once you open it, you need to drink the whole thing since
it’s not resealable. However, we do not shirk away from potential
methanol induced end organ damage from dodgy breweries to provide you
this fine review so…wait…hang on, shit I think I’m going blind!

chap langkau sibu

All kidding aside, it comes with a full money back guarantee – if
the product causes any damage as a result of fudged distillation
processes resulting in product contamination, they basically give you
your RM 5 back. πŸ˜‰

langkau bottoms up
Bottoms up!

Okay, okay I’ll be serious now. πŸ™‚ I’ll say the alcohol content is
around the 30-40% mark, maybe with some added methanol to keep prices
low and drinkers high. πŸ˜‰ We used to say they choose to name it langkau
as in the Hokkien phrase “lim kau lu lang kau”. I’ll tell you one thing
about these motherfuckers though…they’ll give you one hell of a
hangover.

P/S – In all seriousness, my personal advice would be to avoid these
home brewed liquors (moonshine, if you will). It smells like paint
thinner, it tastes like paint thinner. It probably has some
paint thinner in it. :p I get more fucked up on this than branded 40%
liquors. RM 100 says the methanol content in these things exceeds
industry standards. Methanol is the less benign relative of ethanol and
is not a good thing to consume. It’s a stupid thing we used to drink as
poor teenagers but as a working adult, you probably would want to avoid
it except for experimental purposes. The inebriation this white liquor
induces is unsurpassed by regulated liquors so that might appeal to
some experimental users. This was the first time since I was 19 or so
that I’ve revisited this liquor and I do not wish to attempt it again.
But another notorious brand (Cap Apek) awaits…full review soon.
*sigh* My poor brain cells…

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